Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
If anyone has any information on mixed episodes that they'd like to share, please, do enlighten me. There's only so much that I can learn from scouring the internet, and even so, there appear to be many conflicting definitions. So, I thought I'd gather some legitimate knowledge from people who may have firsthand experience.
Now, then. To provide a bit of background info...
I've never had a good psychiatrist. I've despised every last one, as they've all been either careless, incompetent, or both. I rely completely on my therapist to help judge where I'm at mentally and what should be done with my medication. As far as I'm concerned, psychiatrists only exist to write prescriptions and nothing more. So, I don't tend to go to them with these sorts of questions, as I don't really trust their answers.
According to my most recent psychiatrist, I'm bipolar II. He's actually the first doctor I've had who's told me a specific bipolar type, rather than just "bipolar". Nevertheless, I'm not sure if that's right -- but then again, it all depends on the definition of a mixed episode. The DSM says that mixed episodes are criteria of bipolar I and says nothing of their relation to bipolar II, and yet I've heard somebody claim to be bipolar II with mixed episodes. Not sure what to believe.
Now, this most recent psychiatrist doesn't know about the alleged mixed episode I had about a year and a half ago. He only labeled me as bipolar II based on a very ridiculously limited conversation we had the first time we met. The psychiatrist I did have at the time of the episode was the one who initially referred to it as a mixed episode. I had at first just settled with mania, being that I couldn't think straight with how fast my thoughts were moving, I had only about three to four hours of sleep every night, I had entirely lost my appetite as well as over 10% of my body weight in a matter of three weeks, I successfully totaled my mom's car by recklessly driving it into a pole while blasting hard rock (when I'm normally a sensible and perhaps overcautious driver), and I composed a whole five-piece orchestral work in a week, having worked on it for about ten straight hours on some days. So, yes, my first thought was mania.
After wrecking my mom's car, I was taken to my then-psychiatrist. He sat down and (tried to) talk to me, but I was just really upset and angry and wouldn't say a word to him. He suggested, "You know, when people are manic, it's normally very difficult to interrupt their speech..." But I still didn't say anything. So, he said, "This looks to me more like a mixed episode."
He didn't explain it any further than that, so allow me to provide some further insight.
I had been miserable. Absolutely, hopelessly miserable. To a suicidal point. I wanted everything to stop, I wanted peace of mind more than anything. And yet, I was staying up all night every night tearing through sketchbooks and writing music, feeling the hellish restlessness and the itch in my hands to take my guitar by its neck and destroy the innards of my room with it. I had this awful desire to try cocaine, if only I knew where to find any, and I couldn't bear sitting still and letting my mind eat at itself any longer.
My psychiatrist had taken me out of school and raised the dose of my medication, but before he did so, I can remember a day at school where I basically hit a record high when I was talking with friends. Everything in my mind just sort of exploded, and words were leaving my mouth before I could even consider what I was saying. I was basically yelling everything that I said, not pausing to breathe at all, people were trying to calm me down and get me to stop talking, and I eventually dissolved into a laughing fit. Honestly, I don't remember a lot after that, but I know that the feeling didn't last and I was right back to that quiet rage and despair in no time at all.
And that's essentially all I have to say about that. I'm not sure what to think, since I don't entirely trust any of the information I've heard about mixed episodes... And the DSM just barely touches upon it. I don't know if what I experienced was a mixed episode. I'm sure it wasn't rapid cycling, because most everything (save for that elevated spike I mentioned) occurred simultaneously.
To be honest, I don't have even a decent comprehension of any abnormal mood I've ever experienced. Full depressive symptoms and full manic symptoms don't tend to stick around for any more than a day or two tops, and when they do last longer, they're usually all mashed up together so that I don't know what's up and what's down.
So... man, more often than not, I just don't even know what's going on in my head.
Now, then. To provide a bit of background info...
I've never had a good psychiatrist. I've despised every last one, as they've all been either careless, incompetent, or both. I rely completely on my therapist to help judge where I'm at mentally and what should be done with my medication. As far as I'm concerned, psychiatrists only exist to write prescriptions and nothing more. So, I don't tend to go to them with these sorts of questions, as I don't really trust their answers.
According to my most recent psychiatrist, I'm bipolar II. He's actually the first doctor I've had who's told me a specific bipolar type, rather than just "bipolar". Nevertheless, I'm not sure if that's right -- but then again, it all depends on the definition of a mixed episode. The DSM says that mixed episodes are criteria of bipolar I and says nothing of their relation to bipolar II, and yet I've heard somebody claim to be bipolar II with mixed episodes. Not sure what to believe.
Now, this most recent psychiatrist doesn't know about the alleged mixed episode I had about a year and a half ago. He only labeled me as bipolar II based on a very ridiculously limited conversation we had the first time we met. The psychiatrist I did have at the time of the episode was the one who initially referred to it as a mixed episode. I had at first just settled with mania, being that I couldn't think straight with how fast my thoughts were moving, I had only about three to four hours of sleep every night, I had entirely lost my appetite as well as over 10% of my body weight in a matter of three weeks, I successfully totaled my mom's car by recklessly driving it into a pole while blasting hard rock (when I'm normally a sensible and perhaps overcautious driver), and I composed a whole five-piece orchestral work in a week, having worked on it for about ten straight hours on some days. So, yes, my first thought was mania.
After wrecking my mom's car, I was taken to my then-psychiatrist. He sat down and (tried to) talk to me, but I was just really upset and angry and wouldn't say a word to him. He suggested, "You know, when people are manic, it's normally very difficult to interrupt their speech..." But I still didn't say anything. So, he said, "This looks to me more like a mixed episode."
He didn't explain it any further than that, so allow me to provide some further insight.
I had been miserable. Absolutely, hopelessly miserable. To a suicidal point. I wanted everything to stop, I wanted peace of mind more than anything. And yet, I was staying up all night every night tearing through sketchbooks and writing music, feeling the hellish restlessness and the itch in my hands to take my guitar by its neck and destroy the innards of my room with it. I had this awful desire to try cocaine, if only I knew where to find any, and I couldn't bear sitting still and letting my mind eat at itself any longer.
My psychiatrist had taken me out of school and raised the dose of my medication, but before he did so, I can remember a day at school where I basically hit a record high when I was talking with friends. Everything in my mind just sort of exploded, and words were leaving my mouth before I could even consider what I was saying. I was basically yelling everything that I said, not pausing to breathe at all, people were trying to calm me down and get me to stop talking, and I eventually dissolved into a laughing fit. Honestly, I don't remember a lot after that, but I know that the feeling didn't last and I was right back to that quiet rage and despair in no time at all.
And that's essentially all I have to say about that. I'm not sure what to think, since I don't entirely trust any of the information I've heard about mixed episodes... And the DSM just barely touches upon it. I don't know if what I experienced was a mixed episode. I'm sure it wasn't rapid cycling, because most everything (save for that elevated spike I mentioned) occurred simultaneously.
To be honest, I don't have even a decent comprehension of any abnormal mood I've ever experienced. Full depressive symptoms and full manic symptoms don't tend to stick around for any more than a day or two tops, and when they do last longer, they're usually all mashed up together so that I don't know what's up and what's down.
So... man, more often than not, I just don't even know what's going on in my head.
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
A mixed state is a mixture of both depression and usually hypo mania... also called dysphoric mania and often go along with BP 2
There's more depression with BP 2 and more mania with BP1
People are often are agitated....angry... sad... in a depression.. perhaps paranoid and sometimes psychotic as well... It's a miserable state to be in...I've been there.. and meds were used to bring me out of the state
Psychiatrists mostly work with meds now a days... The odd time you hear about a shrink that also does therapy but that isn't the norm anymore.... They're swamped with patients and usually refer the therapy to trained therapists..
If you're happy with your therapist I would ask him/her if they could refer you to a psych... There's already a trust there and perhaps a referral from your therapist would get you in touch with someone you could feel comfortable with
They diagnosis is made on the symptoms that are going on at the time... what you're presenting your doctor with at the time of the appt... It's often referred to as labels now a days and I think that's due to the fact that our diagnosis can change over time and our medical professionals get to know us better and gain more insight
Sometimes our diagnosis change as time goes on and the doctor gets to know us better... However symptoms can be treated in the meantime ...
It often takes quite some time for a firm diagnosis but again symptoms can be treated effectively
It often takes some time to find the right med regime however please know that there is stability to be had and you will find it....We've all been in the beginning stages and it can seem overwhelming at times..
Hang on.....take baby steps.... they're steps in the right direction
Big hug for you and a blessing...x
It sucks learning about and finding meds - it just sucks, and its hard work!
For me, meds are important - and though it takes a long time to find a combination that gives me quality of life and stability - I had to remove triggers and fight impulses.... trouble is expensive! So I work on coping skills and simply making better choices, whether it feels good or not...
Holding on and fighting, working to create a good life is worth it... I"m glad your here, and its frustration and scary, the future seems bleak - but it does get better - the "IT" is you!
Yup that's it. I usually get to imagining reasons why I'm so upset. I climb the walls and am really unbalanced during these episodes. If it weren't for the mixed episodes I probably could be free of medication, but they are so severe for me I have no choice.
http://www.dailystrength.org/search?q=bipolar+teen
SunCloudJD -- Right, yes, I didn't really thinking about the fact that psychiatrists diagnose what they see and not necessarily what's happened in the past... and I am currently a lot better off than I was a couple of years ago. I've been off Lamictal for several months now, and so far so good. Nothing devastating. But, of course, I'm still on Wellbutrin and Deplin. Not sure what things would be like without those. Oh, and I was in the bipolar teen group for a very long time before I finally changed over to this one. The teen group is horribly slow, so I usually bring my business here anyway. I mean, where you all responded to me within the hour, it probably would've taken a few days to get the same response in the BP teen threads, haha.