I prefer hypomania over depression too. Unfortunately, we don't get a choice :-). This is the time of year most of us get depressed, so I just started light therapy again today. Hopefully it works!

I sort of think grief should be dealt with separately from bipolar. Why? Because grief is so so profound, and something every human being encounters and when we don’t allow space for it, the professionals may just dismiss really difficult depression processing as a bipolar (or other mental illness) symptom and dismiss its impact mental on our overall well-being.

Sorry for your loss. I agree - the hypomania is much easier to deal with.

I think that some things change us forever..... Grief can take a long time to process.... If you think that grief has morphed into a depression I would talk with your pdoc about it

I have lost both of my parents for several years now and miss them all the time however now I focus on all that their lives gave to me and what a wonderful gift that they were

I would try and think about the happy times and special moments if you're able to

Write your dad a letter and say to him all of the things that you'd like to say to him and then read it to him aloud

Some grief therapy could help you as well..... Big hug.... I know how very painful grief can be..... I think our folks want us to find peace of mind and there's help if you need it ..... xo

Lost Mom when I was 22 & Dad at 12. Been a very long time ago at this point. Still, they are ALWAYS with me, even though I no longer think about it daily. Always with me because of genetics of course but, as a parent you put tons of yourself into your childs early foundation and they then build on that to become individual adult humans. Your parents are like the flour and sugar that makes you into cake.

Most of the time when thinking about my folks after all this time, it's pretty happy recollections. Nearly all of the time. Makes me happy - sometimes happy & wistful. Every once in a great while when I'm having a really, really rough time of it I break down and bawl my eyes out because I need them so very much.

I think Time does this kindness to most everyone who loses beloved people. So, grieve all you need to now. Purge the great pain.

I know that right now is a horribly painful time and, honestly, it should be. Good parents have earned that measure of love and dedication. Grief is an indication of how great the love you shared, as well as being your homage or tribute to their lives and their love for you. In a way, it is a great gift you give to honor them. They have earned this tribute.

So, give yourself over to the opportunity to pay your dues then let grief pass in indecipherable increments as it should so there is plenty of room in your heart and mind to have the happy recollections and memories and to really feel happy about having them.

Firstly you don't have a separate Depression DX from BiPolar, it's part of BiPolar.

As for the Grief of losing your father, that again is completely separate from the Bipolar and depression. Grief is a normal process that everyone has to go through when they lose a loved one. Nobody goes through it the same way or in the same time. For some it can take quite a long time. If you have a Therapist it would be a good thing to discuss with him/her on the steps to take and how to work through your grief. That doesn't mean you have to forget your dad or not have your memento's, but there are ways to understand and accept his death where you don't have that black cloud over you all the time. And you can keep his pictures and memories with you to remember the good times you had. Focusing on the good times helps drive out the darkness and make it easier to accept and understand that death does not mean he's gone from your life.

Take care,
Kat

From my child hood I always suffered from depression and Anxiety, my relations saw me as different. I did not understand the manic side as yet until I was diagnosed in 2008.

OCD has always been part of my life, but gotten worse over the years.

My grief is an addition, I was grieving my Father from when he got his diagnosis in 2014, I knew I was going to lose him, so I made the best of it.

I tend to separate the Bipolar from the anxiety and depression as this is how my diagnosis is written on all of my consultation letters and the fact that I had the anxiety and depression first.

I am managing my grief better than I thought, I did do two bereavement counselling sessions but found that it was not for me,

I have had therapies over the years

One-to-One Counselling
Bipolar Disorder Group Therapy
Mood Management
Mindfulness
Dance Therapy
Psychodynamic Group Therapy- this one was the most effective and was for 2 years

A lot of people tend to get diagnosed with Depression, before they are ever Diagnosed BiPolar. But BiPolar has 2 parts, Depression and Mania/Hypomania, so when you get formally diagnosed BiPolar the Depression DX goes away, otherwise your just double diagnosed with the same thing.