hi and welcome.

I'm not a single parent, how old are the 4 children btw? I see you are only 27 so that's a heavy burden.

I guess my question would be if you are on meds and if so, as they don't seem to be working, are you challenging your psychiatrist to find something that works for you?

twins are just 4, 5, and 7. My insurance wasn't covering any good ones so I switched and going through adjustments. I have an issue with new pills since do not really have help so when taking up a new one and dealing with the side effects takes a toll on my kids and me.

Okay so as a 28 yr. BiPolar parent of 2 kids, who are now grown, I get it being hard dealing with kids and being BiPolar. I also have multiple medical illnesses to deal with.

I did the parenting by myself as my now ex-husband worked in careers that kept him away from home for weeks at a time, which was fine, I did all of the parenting whether he was home or not...he did the "sports".

Your comment about having an issue with new pills is a bit confusing to me. I would think the untreated symptoms of Anxiety, Depression, OCD, Agoraphobia and possible Manic Eps. would be far harder for your children to deal with and take a much harder toll on them, than the possible side effects of a new medication. Unfortunately Psych meds take a little while to see if they work and you have to go through that phase to get to a point where things are being successfully treated. Its not a step that can be skipped. The alternative for someone with all the things you've listed would generally be....the inability to function?

Are you under the care of a Psychiatrist (Pdoc) and Therapist? I guess I'm trying to figure out how you do the day to day care for 2 four year olds, a 5 year old and a 7 year old on your own with BiPolar, OCD, Anxiety and Agoraphobia that's not properly treated? Along with Spinal Stenosis which if your at the surgery level tends to cause nerve pain, severe back pain, pain with walking, moving, etc. Do you have a parent or grandparent helping you care for these kiddo's?

Questions are how we get to know people and their situations.

Under both care and see a therapist twice a week. I wear a medical back brace. Not really sure how I do it. It’s like I lay down a lot still around the kids get up to make each meal and snack and back to laying. I go through weeks at times that mentally I am fine and can take the kids out with help of course. Seeking help from a care provider for at home. Family helps to a limit, nobody really want to help with four kids so It’s really just me. I am a tech guy so understand education is important so I do read to them and things of that sort but even that’s a struggle. I know I was unclear about medicine wise. Going through adjustment. Have to new medicines that because having so many phobias I’m starting one at a time until I get used to it. If not I’ll be at the hospital daily. Even if I know it’s pointless to go but within the moment it feels rational to go. Had all four in school so that helped a lot. Just worked on getting the oldest enrollment to a better school. I guess I have to give my self credit as my counselor would say when it comes to their schooling the 5 year old is barely going to kinder and is first grade ready. The oldest has been on 504 at each school. It’s hard because I don’t even understand my own issues so stuck on how to help her. We all go counseling. Idk what I’m missing I’m kind of in a weird place with everything feeling fake so trying to ground my self and make them dinner.

I had to tell their schools about my issues and they helped as well

So what meds have they put you on now?

I'm not a single parent but I wanted to give you a hug.... It reads like you're dealing with a lot

I wondered about meds as well as the meds for some of these disorders could potentially work against each other?.... perhaps?

Big hug.....xo

fluoxetine risperidone clonazepam oxcarbazepine on the mental side of things

I'm a single mum with three kids living with me and have Bipolar. It does make things hard and that's without any other problems on top. Hang in there. Sounds like you are having a tough time right now but things may get better. Maybe look at your meds?

Meds two of them are new and so the still haven’t got to full affect yet. Another thing is I don’t have any friends at all so that’s what I am reaching out here. My past was dark and I changed my life for the best so that’s why I have no friends. It’s just a struggle especially with my spine issues. Thank you all for the feed back

So nothing earth shattering on the meds your on a pretty standard BiPolar Cocktail, Prozac for depression, Trileptal and Risperidone which handle the mood stabilizing sides, and Klonopin for Anxiety.

Thankfully your not on any ADD meds because they would probably make life much worse, stimulants and BiPolar do not mix well.

The thing is when you take meds for Medical Illnesses as well they can effect your Psych meds, so you have to watch all the cross-interactions. As I said, I deal with several medical illnesses as well, and I take, well i'm down to 19 meds a day now...so making sure your Physical/Medical meds don't cross with your Psych meds is important. Having a really good pharmacist, one that you've had a meeting with and taken the time to discuss your Medication needs with, who can keep an eye out on all the meds and just give you a heads up if they see anything come across that looks iffy...its a really good tool to have in your arsenal.

I see 7 Specialists, with my PCP and my Pdoc...most of them are in the same hospital system so they have the same Records System, but 2 are not, and everybody is not always a 100% on the same page. And I'm not always a 100% on the same page, depends on pain, BiPolar, sleep, a lot of things...my Pharmacist of 20 years has my back so I don't have to worry as much about every pill if I don't have time to check it before I have to take a dose.

Just a thought, I believe you said you have health insurance, have you checked your policy to see if there are any provision for childcare help during the week, or they might call it an "Aide" of some sort. Some Policies have benefits for single parents with a certain level of disability...

Hi! I remember seeing you comment on a post of mine a couple days ago. Nice to meet you.

I'm not a single parent but I am a mom to a 6 year old boy and 2 year old girl. Believe me when i say, you are my hero for handling 4 kids on your own with your illnesses! I get the parenting struggles, when your symptoms get in the way of the parent you want to be and the guilt that comes from that. I live with that every day too. But I dont know what it's like to deal with all of that mental pain and then physical pain as well. I assume you mean apologizing to your kids, when you mention apologizing, and I apologize sometimes. I use "I'm sorry, but I just dont feel good today" when I've been irritable or spaced out and sort of detached, but that doesnt always feel like it's enough. Maybe try explaining things in a way young kids can understand? That's something I'm definitely working on too. I've told my 6 year old that mommy has strong emotions sometimes that I cant always control, and during my worst depression when my mother in law had to come stay and take care of them we said I had a really bad headache. I dont want them to think any of this has anything to do with them, but I dont want them to know too much before they're old enough to understand. I dont know if I'm handling things at all in the right way but i think all you can do is love them and try hard every day to do right by them which is what it seems you are doing too.

I listen to music literally all the time. I have a mind that is never ever quiet but music helps me also. What kind of music are you into? I listen to everything.

Hang in there. Even though sometimes it doesnt feel like it, you're doing an awesome job, daddy.

I pay for apple music and spotify I live with my headphones in my ears and since I have OCD and am a tech person my headphones always have to be of good quality. I listen to everything as well. Music helps me from not thinking. I see a counselor who is awesome in my opinion and who lets me even take all for kids. When this happens of course cant talk about what I want to but she observes and helps on different perspectives. On the back pain I guess I am waiting for physical theorpy so I can get it stronger and be able to do more and hopefully find someone to accompany me. The two oldest know a little of what I go through, I didnt know how to tell them but the counselor helped. Note the have Adhd and Anxiety issues. And thank you.