ALL LIFE IS HARD.
I've been through 42 years of it and should know by now.
Don't let the mundane control the magnificent. Look to the best.
If your heart is feeling low, or even broken, know that others are, and have been there. I've lost my fear of being alone in any condition, including bipolar. The human condition is the worst to think that you're alone in. You got no thing to worry about, but fear. Fear is horribly disabling. Be free of your inner self telling you that nothing matters. Moths in Cameroon beat their wings, and the winds on your shoulders are evidence of such

Don't give in to those kind of thoughts. I know what it's like to have them but you can fight this. Life is hard. I'm 47 and have been through so much I often wonder how I am still here but I must be here for a reason cause I'm still ticking. So are you. Put those negative thoughts to bed and try to find some positive even if just a tiny thing or two. You are not alone in your feelings and I really wish I had some great advice to make you feel better but all I can say is I am glad I never acted on those kind of thoughts and I pray you don't either. Stand your ground, hang in there, and kick depression in the booty!!! You are not alone. Message and vent anytime. Hugs.

From one redhead to you, Braveredhead, please try to get mad at your bad thoughts and replace them with good ones. I'm here to get support and to give it. I'm with the others when we say yes we know about being BP. Yes we have bad/lousy/horrible thoughts in our heads. It's bad enough to be BP. We beat ourselves into thinking we'd be better off caving in to these thoughts. Well, you have to fight back and keep fighting the good battles when they show up. Win the war? Who knows, but we sure can win the battles every now and then. How about beating the crap out of this battle?! I'm here for you too.

Hey Brave. All of us have to find our own way to survive. I'm starting over after leaving a career of 23 years. I have no idea what I'll do next. I'm trying to think of what I have to do to find work, a permanent place to live, etc., as an epic quest. There will be big ups and huge downs. As we beepers know best, our realities change rapidly. For now, please just get through the next few days. If you can't handle things today, you know that you will be better able to handle things later.

I think you've been given some pretty good advise braver...I hope that you will think about it..
Big hug..llxo