This time, the episode has lasted up to three weeks with no seeming end in sight although it always feels like that when I'm in a depressive episode. I feel completely drained. I've been barely eating and have stopped taking my medication for a couple days when I could not bring myself to get out of bed but now I am back on my medication and this is one of my better days. I feel so unmotivated and hopeless to do anything or practice self care when I feel so worthless. I want to stay strong and positive but I am finding it very difficult. I don't want to keep feeling this way, I don't want to have to keep wondering when my next episode is going to be. I feel so distressed for no real reason and I don't know how to talk about it or explain what I'm feeling or why I'm feeling it which is just plain frustarting. Could really use some encouragement or advice on how to deal with these intense lows. I have so much work to do but no energy or motivation to do it. I'm just tired and I don't know if I'm strong enough to keep going or even succeed that way that I want to in life. I feel bad for venting on here but I figure this is what the platform is for and I like the idea of support from people who go through it as well. I don't want to be a bother to anyone on here and I feel like I keep saying the same things over and over again so I'm sorry. Thank you to whoever took the time to read this. I hope it was not too much of a hassle and I'm sorry again.