I read a blog the other day and this guy declared himself "Bipolar Free" for six years he said. But yet he is still on his meds so if you have to take meds and have no episodes does that mean the bipolar went away? I think not. I think he just got the right meds and they are keeping him stable but this was the first time I have ever heard the term "Bipolar free."If you are correctly diagnosed I think that you will always be bipolar.

Maybe see another pdoc to see what diagnosis he gives.

@ Nester4u
i dont personally think im NOT bipolar any more. im pretty sure the diagnisis is right.. i just have been at an "okay" stage for a while. i mean i have my moments but there much less then they used to be and im not complaining at all, i just feel frustrated because yes this person who told me she doesnt think i am bipolar any more and she said it can go away, apparently her counselor told her it can, honestly she has never seen me in a high or a low. shes never seen it because i have spent from grade 9-grade 12 pretending and i did dam good at it. yes ive had my highs and lows through high school but my parents just thought i was angry or attitude or just crazy hyper. they didnt know anything until i told them months after i was diagnosed. and tho thoughts are better most days i still have those days where there bad again. self harm has pushed its way back into my head a few times, even since having my daughter, but so far ive mostly been able to refuse to give in. the depression hits me once in a while as does the highs but not as often as used to. again definitly not complaining but i feel like this person thinks im not bipolar any more when infact shes never seen me in a high or low because despite my very very bad days, i dont let them show to "outsiders" and she isnt necessairly an outsider as i babysit her children, we have become family. she doesnt see how i feel and what i think some days more so then others. i dont share this stuff with anyone but my significant other.

I understand about hiding it to others. I try and do the same but I am pretty stable with my meds except for some depression and irritability.
I just try to stay away from people when I get that way. I know some people can handle it not being medicated but they are few and in between.

I have BP1 so if I get manic I will eventually go psychotic so I HAVE to take my meds. It sucks but at least it keeps me out of trouble. I hate your having feelings of self-harm. Glad you have a support system. I wish I could just experience some hypomania but I only get manic without meds. Been stable almost 7 yrs.But of course I KNOW I am still BP and what would happen without meds. HUGS!!

@Nester4u
yes hiding it or staying away from others is the easiest thing to do. I am type 2 so not as severe as type 1. i haventr been on meds in almost 2 years but i havent been "normal" the whole time. the highs and lows come and go. how short can a high and low be? do you know?

thanks

Well, you can be in remission for years. I consider myself to have been in remission for about 2 years now as I have not been in the hospital or anything, although I must take medication all the time to maintain this state (which I learned the very hard way). Some people have less severe bp and their remissions are longer and they can go meds-free for periods of time.

When I was in graduate school for psychology, we were taught that an "episode" was at least two weeks for mania and depression, and at least four days for hypomania. So yes, duration has something to do with it clinically (or at least it did 12 years ago, not sure if the criteria has changed). There is a lot of controversy I think over what constitutes an episode. Personally it ticks me off when someone says "I didn't go to bed till 4 am yesterday, I was SO manic! But now I'm fine!" but I have had episodes myself that spiraled in a very, very bad direction in the course of just a couple of days, I think a lot of it really depends on how self-aware you are, and how high your tolerance is for the episodes. I have poor tolerance for anything at all remotely resembling hypomania or mania and tend to seek help for that way faster than I do for anything depression related, sometimes after only a few days of feeling very agitated and scattered.

solo
I'm glad halterbroke answered your question bc I did not know how long bp2 episodes last.. Hope I did not offend when I said I would like to experience hypomania. It's just like feeling anything would be better than the depressive state I've been in for awhile now. Good luck with everything!!

I agree that it can go into remission for long periods of time however bipolar does come back..

I hope you'll work with a therapist regarding self harm... for your daughter as well as you.... The little ones often copy what goes on at home and they are so clever and observant.... This would be a wonderful gift for both of you

Big hug for you....It's great that you are doing so much better...x

@ Halterbroke: Thank you for your comment.. it does help a little. I have had perviously, hypomanic phases lasting 1-2 days maybe even less time, but i can go from hypomanic to depressed instantly (hypomanic for a period of time and then instantly drop to depression). yes it would tick me off when someone said they were in a manic state because they were up till 4am but feel fine now.. I actually forgot that inability to sleep was part of hypomanic (or manic).. ive been having difficut time falling asleep for.... probably 2 weeks now.... (and with a 4m old daughter who sleeps ALL night and easy to go down, and babysitting other kids couple days a week i SHOULD be able to fall asleep no problem...) but during the days im not tired. rarely do i feel tired. i dont get to sleep till probably close to midnight every night (not a biiiiig deal but we lay down at 10:30-11 every night and i lay there for hour or longer unable to sleep.. and im up at 7am every morning. no daily naps for me). but i have hardly felt tired at all. ive been having periods of constant cleaning my house (which is a never happening thing) lots the last two weeks, and i am constantly thinking "i should be doing this i could be doing this, i cant sleep i have so much to do" i cant shut my brain off and sleep. theres just so much to do. "i could re-arrange my closet, i could organize the change table" etc. but im not in a low, nor am i "hyper" i guess you could say. so would i be hypomanic right now based on the trouble sleeping, not tired, constant going, unable to stop??? also irritable at little things often.

@Nester4u: no your comment regarding wishing you were hypomanic right now wasnt offensive :) i totally understand, i spent alot of my high school years and up ubntil 2012 in more depression then hypomanic and i much prefered the hypomanic, except i got very irritable and frustrated in hypomanic.

@SunCloudJD: i actually dont currently see a therapist/counselor or a pdoc. a counselor is available through my doctors office but i dont currently have one. because when i moved here in 2012, i didnt bother to get one. and as far as things are im "okay" without one for now. i do know one is available and i do have my doctor, and since my little girl has doctor checkups every couple months, and they are aware of my mental illness they check up on me as well. as far as the self harm goes, i havent done anything since february, and even then it wasnt cuttting, just scratching with my hands. but i havent done since as i try very very hard NOT to. FOR MY DAUGHTER. as you are right. she will see how i am and what i do and therefore i have to be a positive role model for her. its not easy but im trying. because i spend 24/7 with her i dont have time to go off on my own for self harm anyways. and i refuse to do it with her around me. so i dont. its hard to fight off the thoughts but so far im doing well. and my significant other is aware of everything of course and i talk to him regularly, as our communication is very important to us and our relationship.

thanks ladies for the replies

Briefed over your topic and answers. I have a friend KN who knows what is best for me and she can come up with several reasons to uphold her advice. There isnt any reason to fight her because she is stuck in her ways. So she just pisses me off and I am the one feeling bad!!!! So I guess you could just remove yourself from her a wee bit, not see her as often. Thats what I do with KN. Then when I want her odd friendship again I call her up. I am not a confertational person.

It certainly can't be eradicated. Symptoms might go away with medication but this deal is for life. Have to take medications for life...hard truth to swallow indeed.

I don't think it every "goes away" I am med-free for most of my adult life, and I do pretty well. I bet I would do better on meds, but can't afford them and can't get healthcare coverage assistance and can't afford it on my own even with obamacare.

My Semi-normal phrases can last a pretty long time but in reality there is a day that goes by the the thought pops in my head that this should be the day. I usually push it aside though. I got two boys to be around for.

bipolar is genetic and or chemical...........unless you alter your chemical or genetic make up you always have it in you..........however weather it stays dormant or goes into remission or what ever you choose to call it that is another story. I have to be on medications to have even the illusion of having it in control........

I have to keep a close watch on my thyroid because when it is off i look very symptomatic bipolar wise too.

I also never miss an apointment or lab for my mental health because i am determined to stay well where i can control it and make it easier to recover when episodes i cant control hit.

I have never had anyone say im not bipolar but i have a sister who has been very mean to me and behind my back so I told her she was toxic and we were done.............i think anyone who is not a medical professional telling you your doctor is wrong and not supporting treatment or another doctor is toxic. we can die from this illness.

Hi solofighter,
I am so happy that I came across your post. I am new to this site, well, very new this is my first day. There are many times I have tried fighting with psychologists and psychiatrists saying that I am better and I am not bipolar anymore.. unfortunately I have learned that is not the case.
When I was first diagnosed with bipolar (2006) it was after another attempt by my family doctor giving me antidepressants and things spiraled so out of control that I ended up having my 2 sons taken away from me into child protection and had a 2 month stay in the psych ward... my form of self harm I did between then and 2008 was cutting.. I slit my wrists a bunch of times too.. ended having to get stiches or staples a couple times..bad times... I was then diagnosed with bipolar 1 because once they got the depression under control I ended up flying into a manic state and became very aggressive/hyper and let's just say naughty.. then back and forth back and forth and with the mood swings also came the self harm.

over the last several years I have slowly improved and my diagnosis was changed to bipolar 2 disorder and borderline personality disorder as well as anxiety.

now the arguments I have are because for the last 2 years, although I have had what I would consider minor episodes, I haven't had to be on any medication, not even for anxiety except one time for a brief period. my triggers seem to be when something bad happens to someone I care about.. if that makes sense.. then one particular time when that did happen, I found myself so affected by it that I felt so overwhelmed at hopeless for reasons I can't explain I poured boiling water on my arm and did so continuously until I no longer felt pain, I then ran my arm under hot water to make sure I really did damage.. the physical pain took away from the emotional pain I was experiencing.. I have never told the truth about what really happened until this very moment.. kind of feels good to tell the truth.. anyway, I ended up having 2nd and 3rd degree burns on my arm and just told everyone the tea kettle exploded on me.. yes, I know bad girl.. :(

I haven't done self harm since then (around a year) and am no longer taking medication for anything. I, much like yourself, now only have very minor episodes and have come to accept that I am in what I have been told is the 'well' state. I have read in the dsm 4 that there is also a type of bipolar called cyclothymia which is apparently a mild form of bipolar.. maybe you could ask about that? I don't know if my story has helped you any I hope it will in some form or another. take care and best of luck.

No Bipolar Disorder is not curable, but it is possible to gain stability....kind of like remission. I've been BiPolar for 26 yrs, but had a good 10 yr stretch in the middle where I had to take minimal if any drugs, just a low dose of Lithium here and there. And felt great most of the time.

But it was only a period of Stability, when my brain chemistry was ready to go to hell again full time, it did and I've been actively fighting for stability on the usual multi-med cocktail, therapists, pdocs, etc. for the last 10 years.

kat

I understand not sharing the bad stuff. I think if you babysit her children she may have a desire for you not to be bipolar. You could tell her there is no test to determine it has gone away even if things are normal so it's best to stay on meds in the meantime.