Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
Hi there,
I am curious if anyone else has this problem. I am in college(doesn't mean you have to be), and I struggle a lot to carry out my obligations. Not in the sense that I just don't want to do them, but like my moods really get in the way. They way I feel about one thing is different from the next. I want to take on so much and strive in college, not just be the guy who gets by and takes classes. I want to be more than this! I try so hard to do so, but it seems like my moods always gets in the way, and it's hard for others to understand this. Clubs, organizations, jobs, leadership positions. I take these things on, I strive, and then I find myself eventually not making the obligations required. Whether it's I don't have the energy, my attitude changes, or I just feel out there. I can't seem to hold this things down and it really bothers me. I've really had a hard time in college my first year, and don't understand why I can't just be able to do these things when everyone else appears to do just fine with them. Anyone have these problems in just daily life in general or something similar?
Diagnosis: BP1
Rx: Wellbutrin 300mg, Depakote 1500mg, Abilify 5mg
-Been in and out of the hospital many times this year.
I am curious if anyone else has this problem. I am in college(doesn't mean you have to be), and I struggle a lot to carry out my obligations. Not in the sense that I just don't want to do them, but like my moods really get in the way. They way I feel about one thing is different from the next. I want to take on so much and strive in college, not just be the guy who gets by and takes classes. I want to be more than this! I try so hard to do so, but it seems like my moods always gets in the way, and it's hard for others to understand this. Clubs, organizations, jobs, leadership positions. I take these things on, I strive, and then I find myself eventually not making the obligations required. Whether it's I don't have the energy, my attitude changes, or I just feel out there. I can't seem to hold this things down and it really bothers me. I've really had a hard time in college my first year, and don't understand why I can't just be able to do these things when everyone else appears to do just fine with them. Anyone have these problems in just daily life in general or something similar?
Diagnosis: BP1
Rx: Wellbutrin 300mg, Depakote 1500mg, Abilify 5mg
-Been in and out of the hospital many times this year.
My advice is to hang in there. Try taking classes part-time if you can. I had to take some time off between semesters a couple times, but if you can avoid that it's probably better to take at least one or two classes. Don't worry about the other "normal" people around you. Try not to compare yourself to them. This is a lesson I am still learning in my 40's.
Keep trying to do what you can, i know its hard but you dont wanna end up like me :)
Example - I sign up to do something, school or work, voluteer - I, like you over commit and when I "fail" - makes me think I'm a loser, and my entire future Sucks - because I'm a loser.... Yep, been there...
These days - I remind myself ( A LOT) Bad feelings or bad days, disappointment, mistakes - does not represent the rest of my life... I have to say this over and over, because if I focus on those thoughts, my brain will get worse! Some shit about a chemical imbalance *Big Grin*...
Meds help me, talk and learn how to not give in to doom, and challenge all the typical lies - my mood swings tell me....
There is no greatness, without risking failure! Another one I like, I'd rather make a mistake, then make nothing...
Sorry, guess I got too deep here : ) Hold on, and remember - we DO understand....
Great topic...
It does seem you've accumulated a lot of hats to wear but isn't the one with the tassel on it the one you're there for? Some good points made here, Dalton.
Focus on what you want most out of this time in your life and, of course, leave some time for socializing with those who share the same interests.
I never went to college myself but I do expect the majority who do have their hands full just keeping up their grades and working to pay for expenses.
Best of luck to you.
Starting in October 2011 through January 2012 I was working my 12-hour day job, taking trips to different parts of the U.S., joined the local NAMI board, was in the early part of starting a local DBSA support group, joined the Homeless coalition as the representative from our agency, was going into the office making changes to the office system every other week and some where in there taking out credit cards which I charged up $3,000.00 in one day. Oh and was checking into the steps to move to Ireland because the grass was so green!
By March I was in the hospital for psychosis and by June unemployed.
Moral of the story is to monitor your moods closely with a good pdoc and take your meds as prescribed. Since you are still experiencing these problems and been in and out of the hospital many times this year, you may not have found the right medication combo for you yet. I'm very non-compliant! I didn't take the mood stabilizer AND the Effexor threw me into mania, so I deserve what I got.
Many people with BP live normal lives and keep steady jobs so it can be done. Communicate with your pdoc.
Give yourself some credit, it's hard to go to college and keep your grades up - you've done a hell of a job and you should be proud of yourself. Try baby steps, small tasks or one at a time and it should work out for you a bit better.
I really like the monitoring of your moods, a notebook which has your thoughts feelings etc. so you can see if you're in a downturn or upturn and can cut it off before it gets unmanageable. Good luck with college, I for one am proud of you!