last time i was on here i was going through a tough time, just starting my meds tough time with family and work. Felt very unhappy confused and all. My middle daughter moved to her dads when she was 13 she thought life was easier than it was at home. She learnt after two year of living with him what kind of man he was. We built a friendship up, but i dident realise that he was hurting her, hitting her and mentally abusing her like he did me for many years. She finallly came home last year and we are closer than we ever have been. She turns 18 in a couple of weeks, were all my children will b at an 18th doo, carnt wait. When i was 14 i had to give my baby girl away for adoption, i alway wounderd and sent letters and presents to her file. I never kept her a secret. nearly 3 years ago we met and it was amazing and we have had lots of fun as a family to get to now each other. I struggled for 20 ish years with my illness was put on lots of different meds for dipression, bur never worked. when i was diagnosed it turned my life around, i have my family back and i feel great most of the time. We all said that we would emergrate to austrailer. but my oldest daughter and 18 year old has opted out as they r not ready. But the rest of my family r so i have said that i will go. I will miss my 2 girls like mad. i also have a 10 year old daughter who wants to go. I feel i missed out so much on my babies because my illness wasnent treated properly and wish i could have my time again as i am now. im looking forward to going away, i now things will b dufferent but so long as i can get my meds and keep up then i should be fine. such a big step though