I have been beating myself up over the stupiest thing to me ..My wight! its an obbsion now aways kinda there I havent gained much..five now at one ponit 10 ..I am only 100pounds and I worrying about that..maybe its cuz 120*were I have been befor* is big for me and I was so close I want to go back to 99 when I was at my smallest the start of this summer/spring.. This is so stupid! I swear I feel so bad for my bf not only dealing with my bipolar moods fucking up lately but now hes notciing me trying to hide my tummy frum him when were eat or just sittin there wacthing a moive.. I cant let him see I am not condent.. I am ..just not as much.. I need to see my docter soon.. I think it mite be my pills divalproxe they make people gain wight.. mine been going up and down since we added another 500mg to my moring 500mg..the same thing happen when they frist put me on it to..but i lost it fast.. NOW I AM NOT! I am loseing it over this stupid self centerd thing when theres people with way wrost shit going on..fuck why did I write this..oh well mite as well post it now
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