yes, I believe depression stole part of my soul, that was part of my personality....

(((BIG HUG)))

We have to create a life, griveing what we used to be - the good old days weren't always good... our memories are tainted!

What do you want? Create a life, right a fantasy script - and make it happen. You want to travel, well buy a suitcase.... you want a hobby, pick one....

Long term episodes, to me are like strokes - we have to learn to walk and talk, live, again - create the life you want is your choice...

Its not hopeless - our dis-ease, well you can't go to far back, or to far forward - we forget to live!

Wishing you peace and relief!

Yeah I hear ya...I've been saying for decades now that "everyone around me is broken...therefore I must be broke."

I do remember who I was and how I got to where I am, which is some place many would call nowhere...but I try not to carry a grudge or any regrets...guess that some of the good things I learned getting here.

Try not to fret too much over what you've forgotten...you likely have for good reason.

I went through that when I first moved here to Michigan. . It lasted 4 years. I still don't know what that was about. It sucked though. I just wanted to be me again.

Say, how about it you go to places that you went to when you were 12? Or find some items that you liked (ebay has everything) from your childhood? Any special interests back then?
Just a thought.

i know exactly what you mean. (((BIG hugs)))

I feel very similar. I miss laughing, making jokes, having fun and enjoying talking to people. I just keep telling myself that I am still a great person just how I am now and one day the old me will come back.

But I don't think we're broken. I mean, the thought crosses my mind a lot, I wonder if I'm defective, but inside I know I am unique, special, just the way I'm supposed to be. I hope you can find some comfort, joy and self acceptance. I can really relate to where you're coming from.

Thank you everyone. I know I struggle with forgiveness. I just think honestly I am changed...for better or for worse.

Yeah, I miss who I used to be. I can relate.

((((((Hugs))))))

Totally hear you. Several times, I could have written this myself.

I know what you mean I Lost myself many times along the way during depression but that was the depression speaking to me.
I always seemed to find my way back and with therapy, meds, and live groups and of course DS, I have not lost me or felt broken for some time now.
Have faith and hope, HUGS

Accepting the truth is sad. It is what it is.

We can accept the truth, that we have a life long illness/disorder, and then find a way to live. It is a part of us but doesn't have to become us. We can rise above. Maybe a new part of us wants to be born. The only part of life that stays the same is change. We have to learn to roll with it. We have to learn to love ourselves despite having it. We have to change our perceptions.

I can relate. Sometimes I would like to go back to the me that was fearless. I can't do alot of the things I did before because of the anxiety.
I had to drive myself to the doctor today and like to had a nervous break down before I got back home. Just the thought of driving in all that traffic.I need a job so I don;t sit home and dwell on it.

Each catastrophe that breaks me into a million pieces loses parts of me that i never get back and creates new parts of me. some of those pieces i would like to have back intact but that is never going to happen. some things cannot be fixed.

It sounds to me like you're describing depression perhaps ATO??... I'm flat when I'm well now so I don't feel broken all the time now however I did have to change my expectations of who I am

Big hug for you sweetie...If you are in a depression perhaps make an appt to see your doc??....xo