I'm sorry you feel sad. But remember your therapist is not there to judge you, he/she may have not agreed with what you do. If you didn't have issues you wouldn't need him/her........

Don't beat yourself up for being honest.

Really sorry you feel this way.

When people chose to go on about how good youve been for keeping clean / addiction free xyz, I know it is well intentioned but I always feel like it adds a ton of pressure. And in the end it just makes me less likely to tell them if Ive had a relapse and that is way conterproductive because if there is anything I should be doing then it is reaching out for help.

I wouldnt be yourself up about it though. Yes I understand the anxiety and sadness you feel but you are the first person that should be kind and understanding to yourself. Instead of worrying about what kind of respect she has for you, i would be proud of you that you had the courage to come out and tell her about your past. That takes a lot. (I know I tend to have a number of things I never feel comfortable enough sharing) You are reaching out for help on a subject you may have otherwise left unattended. And that is great!

Also, I dont think therapists should really not have respect for a person for their past. If anything, they should be the people to be respect, understand, and have compassion for people in those situations. After all that is the point of their job. ^^'

I would definitely remember how you are feeling and mention it to your doctor about having suicidal thoughts however fleeting they may be. A little tweak could really help that so you dont feel so anxious that if you get upset because of xyz thing those thoughts may return.

I Doubt that you let your therapist down. It's a new day and you aren't drinking and smoking right now, right? I hop you won't be too hard on yourself cus it's making you sad.((HUGS))

thank you all for replying..no im not drinking and i wont again since im on the meds and the smoking was a one time impulsive thing. i told her that i do care about being on meds and i dont wanna mess with them and she was like 'u can tell me that all u want but its you that has to care' and i do care so im not gonna drink or do anything stuppid anymore

im still sad but not about this.just down..i dont want my meds anymore..ther not working and im sick of them

Your therapist is there to help not judge, think of it this way at least you have the courage to tell tehm and address the issue- most people wouldn't think twice.

You made a mistake. Forgive yourself and start afresh. When dieting sometimes I slip up and have a cookie. Now if I forgive myself it's just one cookie and I'm back to being a good girl. If I beat myself I am demoralized and defeated and I eat the whole bag. You had one little slip up, pick yourself back up and don't forget about how much you've accomplished before that one little slip up.

i forgive myself...past is done..its just im sad for no reason now