I recently went through a big episode having gone off my meds back in the spring. Since i've left the hospital, I find I am eating a lot and gaining weight like crazy. I sleep all day and I look like a mess when I go out in public. I feel like I've hit rock bottom in my life. Over the weekend I'd been dog sitting for my parents which helped me to feel sane staying at my parents home, and my step dad has invited me to stay longer So I'll be here till Tuesday.

I'm trying to find a new place in my home town where I feel safe. I'm always afraid of people's reaction toward me, and when it comes to me and "Oh hi where are you working" and I'm on disability. And I currently don't have many friends...

Hey! When I was psychotic I was a (beautiful) genius...There was nothing I couldn't solve and I saw ecstasy and eternity between two figures in the sky and they were made of a rainbow! It was awesome. OH and I met Jesus and then I met Satan in the hospital and the hospital wasn't fun they kept nailing me down and giving me shots and giving my huge bruises on my arms and legs and I started to hear voices, which made big fabrications, and I was supposed to be The Queen of the Universe and ........... Needless to say I've been through a lot of hardship and the aftermath is not fun...

I just felt like posting on here maybe someone would offer some wise words of encouragement. Thanks to all who respond! Peace, love and joy to you