Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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Is this normal?

zombiewant2be
zombiewant2be
I have always tried to hold myself to a normal standard of daily performance as has my mom. She expects has always expected me to do things that I feel I will not be able to do. My mental state has gotten worse and my fianc tells me that it's something that I can't help and I just can't do things and tells me not to be so hard on myself. I feel a little relieved that somebody realizes this but I also feel like I'm just a lazy butt for not being able to do things and for having this problem. A lot of the time I want to pretend that I don't have a mental disorder and that I can do everything.
dobiedots
dobiedots
Why put all that stress on yourself? Have you been recently diagnosed? It does take time to let it all sink in. I think we've all had problems adjusting to the fact that we have bipolar.
You're boyfriend sounds smart! Don't think badly of yourself because you can no longer do things you used to. It is an illness, it's not a choice. If you had cancer, would you be so hard on yourelf? Probably not! It's the same thing....a physical illness. Not your fault!
sadiegirl13
sadiegirl13
Accepting and honoring your personal limitations is very difficult. But one thing to remember is that EVERYONE has limitations, not just those of us with MI. If you can get to a place where you can accept and respect your limits much of the time (no one's perfect, and we all mourn our situations every now and then), I think you will find yourself less stressed. Good luck
beckyp
beckyp
I'm glad you have a boyfriend who has so much compassion and understanding about your illness. There is nothing wrong with you not being able to do certain things. We all have our limitations. Don't be so hard on yourself. You are not lazy. You have a mental illness and that's okay too.
spacepony
spacepony
I'm sorry you're feeling down about this. A lot of people, and folks with bipolar can be particularly self critical and have some unrealistic expectations of ourselves we would not place on other people.

Are you recently diagnosed? When I realized certain limitations that troubled me were created by illness rather than a personal flaw, I was relieved...but this was bittersweet because this meant I had less control then I thought. One good thing coming out of this was that I had permission to remove unnecessary stressors from my life. Stress can aggravate BP (or general health for that matter!).

This would be a good topic for therapy. How great that your boyfriend is looking out for you with understanding.
zombiewant2be
zombiewant2be
Thank you guys. This has been helpful. I was diagnosed 4 years ago but I am recently living more independent from my mom. She always held me to high expectations. I always felt like it was my fault when I couldn't meet them.
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