Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
I am feeling overwhelmed by my life. I feel like I am going to lose my mind. I am worried about getting fired, I am having multiple health challenges, car issues that have caused me stress, money issues, I don't know how much more I can deal with. My family members are highly toxic as well. Plus I am a cancer survivor going on 7 years. I have lost several friends to this cancer and am about to lose another one. It makes me feel extremely guilty to stress over these things when I survived cancer. I wish I could be the one that could die and spare my dying friend's life. She is married, has kids. I am alone, no kids...I am just a big walking nightmare
I am caught in a vicious cycle. I am severely overweight. The bigger I get, the more it hurts to move, the more weight I gain, I get more depressed, I eat more, I gain more...on and on. I have been in severe pain in my leg for the past few weeks. After going thru a lot of expensive tests that I have no way to pay for, I saw my chiropractor. He thinks it is my back. I am so depressed. I HATE MYSELF. I have no one to blame but myself. I wish I could just die in my sleep. I don't know how to turn this train wreck around. I feel hopeless.
I am caught in a vicious cycle. I am severely overweight. The bigger I get, the more it hurts to move, the more weight I gain, I get more depressed, I eat more, I gain more...on and on. I have been in severe pain in my leg for the past few weeks. After going thru a lot of expensive tests that I have no way to pay for, I saw my chiropractor. He thinks it is my back. I am so depressed. I HATE MYSELF. I have no one to blame but myself. I wish I could just die in my sleep. I don't know how to turn this train wreck around. I feel hopeless.
First, I would like to say I am so sorry for what you are going thru.
I have been exactly where you are with feeling overwhelmed by all the crappy issues ~ money, car trouble, family toxicity...you name it. I tackled one issue at a time, then broke each goal into smaller steps, inching my way towards solutions. I was also lucky enough to have a loving and caring church family who helped with finances, both by giving money for things like groceries, to helping with financial planning.
As far as all the health problems, that's tough. The chronic pain just feeds that depression. The money necessary to wade thru all that medical crap is outstanding. Then, the vicious cycle of needing to exercise, but feeling so bad, you don't think you can move, and so on, and so on.
I just decided I would walk a couple of leisurely laps around my apartment complex, either with family, or playing my music. I've also been advised to get into a gym, or sometimes "public" kind of PT center. Walk laps in heated pool. Resistance without hurting joints and pain.
Could something like that possibly work for you?
Good luck. Take it slow, but do try to take the steps.
XX
I know how you feel. My Grandmother really drove me up the wall today when I took her to town. I need to regroup.
My leg was just starting to feel better..and then I fell on both knees and caught myself on my right arm. Now I am in worse pain...then I got my car stuck in snow (we had a foot of snow last night!)
I am hiding inside until Monday at 7:45 am :(
While some of the reasons are different, I have been in such a low place that I hated absolutely every aspect of my life.
And that's such a crushingly horrible existence.
Completely miserable.
Being hopeless is about the lowest place to be.
I'm sorry you are there.
I don't think you are going to be like this forever. (Or worse.)
But I remember from when I felt like that, it's impossible to see a brighter future from that vantage point.
I wish you felt better right now.
I wish you were in better health.
I'm sorry all those bad things are going on in your life. And in your friend's life.
I hope things are better soon.
I hope you are able to take some joy in life.
If it's at all possible to see your Pdoc and perhaps get a new treatment plan, I hope you will give it a try.
And if there's nothing you can do, I'm very sorry indeed.
Wishing you all the best, TC!!!
(((((Hugs)))))
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Often seems when it rains, it poors.
(((hugs)))
MY PDOC IS VERY WEIRD. she is supportive sometimes and other times can be very condescending. It is very confusing.