Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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meme88 08/20/2009

I am now okay with randomly my bf saying tue this weekend lets go away that gives me two days to get my head around it.
tonite on he says oh and fri befor we leave for the weekend saterday i have free tickets to this rapper,its up to you if yo want to go..6 or 7 years ago i would have jumped at that..now i think omg the people i want to have fun i want to be like everyone esle..my mind frezzes ..everyone is wacthing what im doing..Tho i know there not..
I Cant relax in big groups anything bigger then 10 im fucked..were is that me that would jump into a mosh pitt and thinking nothing of it stand in the front alone and not care..were she go..why did she leave i honestly want to take clorazpam to go..but i dont no if that will work mite just make me wanna sit down lol or sleep..
what do u think? understand me? crazy? lol should i take the colrazpam..well post or msg me im off for my bath be back in 10

deleted_user 08/20/2009

I don't know the whole situation but I think you should go if you are just very slightly uncomfortable.

It is a problem when people feel a bit of anxiety about going out and doing things. They find excuses not to go out, eventually not going out for smaller and smaller things. I think it could be like a snowball effect that could eventually lead to you being a shut in.

then again, you are leaving for the weekend, but I would still go for it and get out and see the world just a little bit. Remember we have one life to live, do you want to live it just in your house or whatever?

meme88 08/20/2009

my point this is my one life..and i wanan go BUT i know my bodies reaction will be to shut down and not have fun even if i wanted to..then my bf feels like what was the point if u dont have fun..i want to go but the last time i said oh i'll go and just get over it..agin i shut down..anytime theres a big group i shut down. partys bars(that im not confable in)..i turely hate it inside it drives me more crazy

deleted_user 08/20/2009

Hmmm, sounds like something that will probably take more than just one night to get over. You will probably have to work on that one for a while to be able to get over your fear of large groups.

Maybe then tell your boyfriend you want to have energy for the weekend and would rather stay at home with him and rent a movie or something.

meme88 08/20/2009

i dont care if he gose i dont wanna mess up his fun..he knows if i dont go why..he knows groups are hard for me..dose understand but i cant expect him too. i'll just stay home and relax clean up maybe come back to my house(My mum and dads and hang out with them till 2am) when the show is done..i mean my mum and dad will pass out befor then but then i can come on here and chat..im not sure i can do home alone for that long..ya ok i need to get over that too ok if i dont go with him i will stay at his house alone i'll be okay!anyway he'll let me use his compture to go online i'll busy myself with sumthing..maybe lol

deleted_user 08/20/2009

Have you ever tried a clonazepam before? I don't think it would be wise to try one when you're out in public unless you know that you'll be ok. As far as large crowds go...I feel the EXACT same as you do. I recently went to a casino and a concert in the same night once and I thought it would trigger a swing, but I concentrated on other things that were around me. (I was stoned by the time we got there, so that helped) Smoke some pot, darling! It works for me.
It's MUCH harder to do than to say but try to take notice of things around you, and talk. I talked through the whole concert, I had to. (No one could hear me anyway) :P
Have fun.

meme88 08/20/2009

ya i have taken clorazpam befor i have a whole bottle full 1mg 60tabs well maybe 50 now lol
1mg makes me sleepy 0.5 mellow but thinking cuz i would be way more worked up then nomral i would be find to take 1mg..
haha pot oh pot how i miss pot..it use to get me back kinda sumwhat to the old me..but my brain was fucked..my bf asked me to quit i couldnt he waited long time the i had to ween off effxor i was too sick to smoke well weening off it made my symtoms wrost by the time i was okay to smoke by bf would ask me if i really wanted to the addtick in me says hell yes..but every nite i would thank him..when i felt able to try and not worrie about getting addticked it went bad very bad..now its very bad very bad i lost the use of that did alot of good stopping very little bad came frum it...

deleted_user 08/20/2009

In that case, I would go on and take one. Or at least take one with you so its there if you need it. :)

meme88 08/20/2009

the bottle gose with me every were! its like a safe...i can leave it at home i have befor but..i feel better when its there..its with me(as well as my week med box) almost as much as my neckles i never take off LOL sad...my pruse is alway with me never go anwaywere with out it...it gose to bed with me..i think thats a irish /my nanny habit i got sum how after she passed

meme88 08/20/2009

and the verdick is! I am not going.
I talked with my boyfriend and he said its up to me but he feels when i am there he feels he must be more protective and careful dosent wanna go up front ect cuz well he knows me.*he says this all very timed and unsure if im gunna be upset*
And I tell him I feel the same pretty much that he has well turefully more fun with out me just like he dose have to look back and think oh is she haveing fun she looks worried lets stand over there ..not were he wants to be he want to be up front..I want to be at home LOL funny we both thought the same thing but were both so hensten to say anything on no sure how the other one will react..wow..reasons i love my boyfriend

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