Bereavement Support Group

Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Whether you lost someone recently or it's been years, grief and its accompanying emotions can be complicated to cope with. Join our online support group to connect with a supportive group of people who really know how you feel. Help is right here.

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vader 12/22/2015

I am writing this column and it will appear that I am down right nasty.But when a person loses someone ..people try to "cheer them up."My cousin did this when I lost Brad and it made me feel worse.What did he do? He sent me a newsletter.It a letter that tells about everything that is happening in the family.ANd it really hurt me.People who mourn do not want to hear about your trip to the Virgin Islands.And spare me the whole details about it.I don't want to see pictures of your new house and I will tell you why...some of the people that I know have a house and some are in foreclosure.How can you send a newsletter like this? I don't want to hear about your rises.Washington just made history...In a few years...some ofus will make 15.00 an hour and this may seem a lot of money to you..but some are just surviving on minimum wage here and they struggle to pay their mortgage every month.I know several widows in my group who are barely making it.Som e of them do not eat just to get this medications.Why isn't people thinking about the grieving and ones who are in pain? And the same things goes for office parties.If you are grieving please do not go...because some times people say things at these parties and it is held against them.You must be careful.Watch what you send and say.SO if people wish you Merry Christmas...Smile.The best thing to do is to say nothing.Vader/

ThePepperMan 12/22/2015

I am sorry that you were upset by those actions.

I guess I'm a bit different. If any of my family had gone on a wonderful vacation that they were very excited about I would have loved to hear about it, even in one of those family newsletters that some people send out.

I will be missing my parents and sister, most likely for the rest of my life. My peace will be getting to the stage where I smile when I think about them, and note to myself that "they would have liked that" when I see or hear about something I know they would have liked.

We have a grand nephew in the family, he was born about 3 months after my mother passed away. I was very happy for my niece and her husband, and delighted in all the pictures they sent to us.

But when I was experiencing moments of sadness in my bereavement, I would either ignore the emails, or excuse myself from the room.

To each their own.

Sara59 12/25/2015

I had a friend who would do this. She moved across the state and had no idea what my life was like. I think it is presumptuous at best, and tiresome for the reader at least, to send long missives, with pictures yet, detailing one's successes, accomplishments, and raises. Some of us are indeed struggling, I know I was, I took the initiative one year to tell her about my chronic pain, my husband's lay off, as well as my one son's learning disability. I never heard anything from her until the next Christmas. Once again, it was a two page description of the wonder that is her life. I gave up and threw the thing in the garbage ever after. When you are in the midst of grief you are hurting, period. At least be decent and have a sense there may be loss before you blow your own horn. My husband died 3 years ago and it still hurts. My pastor sent everyone in the congregation one of these idiotic things. Well thank God you still have your wife, and she has her many horses that she can afford to love, plus your several glorious vacations. You deserve it since you chide the congregation all year long for not giving enough of their SS check to the church. Ugh, I could go on, but I am gettin' mad.

ThePepperMan 12/26/2015

I agree with the annual brag letter; especially when they are sent to people they have little or no contact with.

ThePepperMan 12/26/2015

Uh, I agree with Sara, those brag letters are annoying at best.

koolman 12/26/2015

They MEAN well...but...yeah.

tangoballerina 01/03/2016

I find the newsletter format terrible in every context. Even prior to the loss of my close family members, receiving the printed bragging sheets were highly insensitive. As many of you all ready mentioned, there are others people struggling and don't need ostentatious people flashing the flood light onto their self imposed pedestals. Do these newsletter editor think the rest of us are jumping for joy to read their nonsense? If they cared to share...a simple phone call to talk about it would be fine...but possibly a short conversation.

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