My father died in my arms on November 1st,1987.He was 71 years old and spent most of his life in the hospital due to a injury.He was in the hospital for prostate and was operated on but told the doctor that he wanted to go home...he wanted to be home.And he came home at 9.30 and died at 11 0 clock.And his last words to me were"Vader...I am dying" Then he collapsed in my arms as he was heavy and my mother put him on the floor.We called the police and they did cpr..but he was gone when he was on the chair.And regardless of what people say....the death of a parent can be devasting.My father was a wonderful person.You see in 1962 at the age of 14....I came down with a rare type of mental illness.It wasnt not curable then and i had to go to the school psycholpist and i had to go a psychiairst.I have been on several medications.And now I am almost cured of my mental illness.I am on abilify and i feel wonderful.I feel so happy and normal.I no longer feel like a freak.There has been deaths and tragedies in my life that have really hurt me.But back in the 1960s when all of this happened.....help was unavailable.In 1969...a girl who I worked with was murdered.She was a cashier in the beauty department and was suppose to go to a party with her.She left after work.Noone knows what happened.All I know is that she was found on the river and she was suffocated.I usually read the paper in the morning with my coffee and toast..but on this day...my father hid the paper.He and my grandfather did not tell me until I came home from work and then they showed me the paper.I screamed.Then my father spoke to me and said ...."vader....please do not blame yourself for what has happened.I am glad that you didnt go to this party.She did not make it to this party.Noone knows what has happened.But remember her for the person that she was and ask The Good Lord that this person is brought to justice." As I cried...my grandfather came in and told me the same thing....."Vader...I am going back to Italy to retire there and dont know when I will be back.But here is a piece of advi ce...do n ot accept rides from people you do not know and never accept or take a ride from a married man.This leads to danger." Then he kissed me and left for the airport.I was 22 when this happened.My father knew that I was upset and wanted to talk.He made all of us home made raviolie and salad and garlic bread and then he made me chocolate chip ice cream the next day....! One day I was crying and I asked someone who would kill my friend and my father responded."A very sick person" and he never discussed her death with me again.He just knew how hurt I was.Support groups in 1969 were unheard of and there was no comfort for people who lost their friends or sibliings to murder..but my father always believed that this person would be caught and I hope that he was right.In 2003,I return home for my mothers funeral and visited the olde neighborhood.In 2003 a up and coming writer in New York wrote a story about the Jersey girls whose murders were not solved and he found out interesting information.The night of the party,she took a bus to Hackensack an d was seen getting off that the bus station.She never made it to the party and returned to the bus station.There was a dark haired man with a nice smile who struck up a conversation with her and she talked to him for quite a while.Then she left with him and thats all the article said.They dont know who this person is and noone as come forwarded.The death of these two people have hurt me tremedously,.My father loved mystery and he loved books and music and loved and I mean loved Bing Crosby.He also collected records...My father had 675 records in his collectionj which I had to sell.One day I was depressed and my father knew it.And he told me that life would get better for me.The hurt of his death os still hurting me and when the anniversary comes.I will cry.I will cry for this wonderful person and man who helped me with this death and it is a shame that he is not arounde..you see I am getting well.I wrote everyday and I sing.As for Brad....i am still hurting also but noone man and I mean no man can and will take the place of my father.I love you daddy...you were the best.And I hope to for all of us tobe together again never to be parted.vader.