Bereavement Support Group
Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Whether you lost someone recently or it's been years, grief and its accompanying emotions can be complicated to cope with. Join our online support group to connect with a supportive group of people who really know how you feel. Help is right here.
Maybe it will help to tell this story. This has been the most painful experience of my life.
Two weeks ago, I woke up to find my girlfriend, the love of my life, dead beside me in our bed. While the cause of death is still not known, she had been in a car accident ~24 hours prior and did not receive proper medical care. Alcohol was a major factor, and instead of being taken to the hospital, she was taken to jail. I freaked out and was ready to leave her because her drinking was by this time out of control. I was angry because she had totaled the car I had just bought for her, but I was unaware of the extent of her injuries. I returned the next day, more in control of my emotions, and we apologised to each other. She promised to quit drinking. We spent her final day reaffirming our love, talking, holding one another. Being emotionally and physically exhausted, we fell asleep confident that the next day would bring better things. By morning she was cold and gone.
I have since been on the verge of suicide several times. It's difficult to see any happiness in my future because everything revolved around our future. I had bonded very strongly with her twin six-year-old girls, and they are no longer a part of my daily life since they've gone to live with their father. I feel very alone, as if my whole world has been ripped away, despite support from family (hers and mine) and friends. I despair of ever finding love again because the strength of her love for me was like nothing I have ever known. We were meant to be and we are no more. I don't know where to go from here.
Two weeks ago, I woke up to find my girlfriend, the love of my life, dead beside me in our bed. While the cause of death is still not known, she had been in a car accident ~24 hours prior and did not receive proper medical care. Alcohol was a major factor, and instead of being taken to the hospital, she was taken to jail. I freaked out and was ready to leave her because her drinking was by this time out of control. I was angry because she had totaled the car I had just bought for her, but I was unaware of the extent of her injuries. I returned the next day, more in control of my emotions, and we apologised to each other. She promised to quit drinking. We spent her final day reaffirming our love, talking, holding one another. Being emotionally and physically exhausted, we fell asleep confident that the next day would bring better things. By morning she was cold and gone.
I have since been on the verge of suicide several times. It's difficult to see any happiness in my future because everything revolved around our future. I had bonded very strongly with her twin six-year-old girls, and they are no longer a part of my daily life since they've gone to live with their father. I feel very alone, as if my whole world has been ripped away, despite support from family (hers and mine) and friends. I despair of ever finding love again because the strength of her love for me was like nothing I have ever known. We were meant to be and we are no more. I don't know where to go from here.
I can not imagine what this feels like as I had time to prepare for my mother's passing. I do know that being surrounded by those who love me made a big difference in not feeling alone in my grief. I could cry, yell, not talk, whatever it took. With suicidal thoughts, it is best not to be alone.