Bereavement Support Group
Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Whether you lost someone recently or it's been years, grief and its accompanying emotions can be complicated to cope with. Join our online support group to connect with a supportive group of people who really know how you feel. Help is right here.
I've been dealing with a hell of a year. First my mom dies from metastatic breast cancer after fighting as hard as she could for the past two and half years. Then my Dad, who had been married to my Mom 44 years, had an unexpected and sudden heart attack six months after she passed. I found him dead on the kitchen floor. I’m an only child who is 32 with no husband, children, or significant other. Growing up as an only child with my parents the three of us were extremely close. My mom was my best friend, my soul mate, my sister, my everything. We went everywhere together and she was my rock from which I would draw strength, always cheering me on, supporting me, making me feel loved, she was an amazing parent. I was just as close to my dad and when my mom died he held it together very well afterwards but I know deep down he was feeling lost and full of despair because he died so shortly after she did and he was suffering without her. And now I’m suffering without them. I got accepted into a dental hygiene program which was my lifelong dream that I'd been working towards for years and neither of my parents were alive to see me get accepted or even start. School is VERY intense and difficult, it's full time 24/7 because when you're not in class there is so much homework and studying to do that there's no time for anything else. I inherited my parents home and am living in it alone for the first time in my life. They both passed away in this home and it gives me a strange comfort because I like to think they are here with me somehow. I’m fairly young so not a single one of my friends has lost a parent and I have virtually no one to talk to who can relate. I’m hoping to find people here I can connect with and share my thoughts and hear from others who have had similar experiences and are currently in the trenches of full blown grief like I am. I miss them both so much they were my world and with them gone I feel so alone that it can be terrifying at times. Knowing neither one of them will be there when I get married someday, when I graduate from school in a few years, or when I have kids. Those little things are the things that make my heart ache when I realize all of the future events that I will be parentless for. If anyone has any advice or can relate please feel free to respond. I feel so alone and have nobody that understands what I’m going through at all.
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Due to my increased paranoia, anxiety, and a panic attack over the weekend, my psychiatrist has put me back in a full dose of Zyprexa until further notice. Every time I think I'm getting ahead something happens and it's back to square one. I knew he was gonna do this but I can't help feeling disappointed. It is what it is.
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Well, good morning to you!Today is National Roller Coaster Day. Are any of you going?It's also National Tell-A-Joke Day! Come up with some and share!I'm not bright with jokes these days, but I'll start:"Today I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon...I'll let you know." :D
Nothing really ever prepares us for the grief of losing those who are closest to us..... In some ways I think it's a good thing..... I don't know if I would have wanted the feelings of sorrow before hand
It's a process and it takes time.... I have lost both of my parents and what I have found over time is that the initial anguish doesn't stay forever...
Now I can think about my folks or look at photos and I feel gratitude and I can laugh if I think of something funny that we did without feeling guilty but it takes time to get to that place
I will always miss them
A RL bereavement group might be a big source of help and support for you... I find peer support very helpful and sometimes being right there can really make a difference....xo
Butttttttttaaaaaaaaaa. . .
DS is a big site with allot of great support available for the asking. I hope you'll take the time to surf around and see if some of the other forums can help you through the lurch. Welcome aboard.
Just know that grief is normal, and no one grieves the same. You'll find that certain things trigger a flow of tears out of nowhere (when I lost my brother at a young age, I saw something on a magazine at the grocery checkout and started bawling). Don't hide it and don't expect others to understand. Give yourself the time, space, and grace to feel the sadness and let it happen and slowly heal.
The fact that you're in an intensive dental program is stressful in and of itself, which might compound your grief. If you can find time to attend a grief support group, it would be immensely helpful. Just knowing you're not alone, and having others understand all the feelings of grief, is so comforting. You can find such groups at hospitals, churches, hospice organizations, and even mortuaries. Reach out and find one!
I want to say that you are VERY blessed to have had not one, but two wonderful parents with whom you were close. I lost my father a few years ago, but he was a terrible man who abused me and hurt many people throughout life. He died a lonely, miserable person. I don't know if it's comforting to you to hear me say that you can count your blessings and be very thankful for the parents you had, even though you lost them sooner than you had expected.
Hold their memories close, talk about them, look at pictures of them. I've even heard that writing a letter to your loved one is so healing and cathartic! You can write and tell them how much you miss them, and what's going on in your life, and how many great memories you have with them.
In the meantime, as you have time, it'd be good for you to start building a new support system. Do you attend church? It's a great place to meet good people, not to mention, a great place to learn about God and how much you're loved and how to walk in joy, peace, and truth with him. He knows your heart and what's going on, and would love to be invited into your life to comfort and heal you.
Other great places to build a community for yourself: gym, book club, community classes, hobby clubs, serving others at homeless shelters, nursing homes, animal shelters...the possibilities are endless. Avoid bars and other pick-up places, where people end up lonelier and sadder after being used for a night.
For now, while in school, maybe someone would like to get together with you to study. I know it can be scary to put yourself out there, but you gotta take that first step. Someone else who's lonely is waiting for YOU to reach out!
From the bottom of my heart, I send you great love. I pray that God is a comfort to you during your saddest moments. Many hugs to you!
Venting and getting out your feelings is good..... xo
Commenting as you did on your post is great!
You're doing great, BSM. Keep on keeping on.
Conversely, grouping with the help of group friends allows you less time to do your own personal research; you may share with others dealing with like matters. Then there are those who take way too much sharing time while using live support groups, so you may not even feel valued while in a person-to-person setting. And then sometimes paranoid feelings are a problem when you feel that all eyes are on you at the moment of speaking out honestly and openly. Thus there are times when you will worry who's judging you. Some may not be prepared for the blunt truth of a matter. So, there are mental and emotional advantages to both online support or the in-person group support systems. Inside the pleasure of home, where it is easy, there are comfort and relaxation moments for sure. On the other hand, while engaging with others, face to face contact is limited to the seating, atmosphere, possible crowding or an audience fewer than what is expected.
Additionally, being online you don't have to fret over a sense of time or schedules such as with the manner of live support. Aside from a living group, you can regulate your emotions while in private, especially when dealing with adverse situations. Keeping this point in mind, online time makes it much easier than sitting inside of a face to face group. You may set your own schedule while managing online support. The live group has no delete or ignore options you have to listen to subjects that may not interest you while processing live conversations: and what you personally tell to a live group cannot be erased from the memory nor can you avoid what others are sharing with you that seems rather inappropriate in comparison to your own needs. While in-home, you may process your online experiences and take the necessary time to reflect. Social support groups may cause you to become bored and the mind will wonder when the subject matter is less interesting.
Last to tell is that at best an online support group is a great place to store your posts, somewhat used in the same way as a personal journal or reference diary (spot on and detailed); this is for your convenience to read over and over again, getting to the point of a matter based on sound time and effort, working here a little and there a little; otherwise, there may be a rush to get better when others are depending on it. Online support leaves with bearing no other person to disappoint other than yourself.
It's a pleasure to chat with you!
https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-growth-impact-of-online-mental-health/
I found this an interesting article.
Perhaps, even just joining a local colleges and careers church group might be a great place to meet like minded individuals whom are at least in the same stage of life as you to possibly buddy up and have an outlet socially to look forward to.
My sister died in her sleep at the age of 42, she was 3 years older than me and, we thought, had a lot of life to live. Death at any age always seems to come to soon or sooner than we seem to feel it should happen. My other living sister has stage 4 cancer and is dying daily... I often wonder which one had/has it worse... quick or drug out. All I know is this... life is short and eternity even longer. Search out the peace and help you need to heal your broken heart and live your life having your loving parents as your guide and take the good things they passed on to you and live life to the fullest as their guiding presence living through you as your fuel. Praying for peace and healing friend!