I am so sorry for your loss. I have not lost a child, but have picked up the pieces for my parents in the passing of my brother 39 years ago (my brother was killed in a motorcycle accident when he was 16). It has been a lifetime of heartbreak for my parents.....my dad just joined my brother 2.5 years ago. My parents were never the same....and rightfully so.
I am so glad you have Jacob's children....and another son. You all need each other and will help keep Jacob's memory alive. I know the pain is excruciating, especially through the holiday season. You don't get over it, but somehow you do get through it together.
I am so glad to see that you have joined the group for moms who have lost a child. reaching out is so important.....becuz no one should have to endure such a loss alone.
Take care of yourself dear lady. Surround yourself with support and loved ones. Be patient with yourself becuz grief takes time.
Focus on Jacobs kids and your other son too. My mom and dad focused so much on the loss of my brother that they forgot about me which made it difficult for me as well.....it was my loss too. So learn to lean on each other...ok? (((((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))))))

I know how you feel. I lost my 24-year-old son Ryan 4+ years ago, 4 days after my birthday. The best way I have found to cope is to take one moment at a time and be patient and loving with myself. It is a difficult road but, with the help of others who share a similar experience, it is possible to move forward (not move on--you never want to leave your loved one--your son is and will continue to be with you every step of the way). But in the deep grief, sometimes we don't feel their presence. Please believe things will improve and you will get to the point where your good days are more frequent than the "difficult" days. Better days are ahead. I'm sending you (((hugs))). Dee

JacobsMom, I lost my son to a drug overdose also. He was 27 when he passed on June 26th. It was a most distressing time and sometimes I still can't believe it's true. He has a 7 year old daughter that I am taking care of temporarily. She has been a shining light in my life at this dark time.
I have connected with the church which has given me great faith that he is not in pain anymore and is in heaven. I still grieve but I have to remember that it is God's will and that everything He has a hand in; has a purpose.
I highly recommend the Christian book store where you may find reassurance or even ( as I did) uplifting music that I listen to constantly. I hope you will check out youtube; Sidewalk Prophet's song Make me Broken, or For King or Country's Fix My Eyes.
I bought the top hits of 2015 CD and I listen to the contemporary music with my heart as well as my ears.
There is also grief support in your community and if you every want to message me I would be happy to share my story with you.

I just now read about the loss of your son. I am sorry for your loss. There are no words to be said to take the pain away, just words to help ease the pain. I have not lost a child but I have lost my nephew to a drug overdose. The one member mentioned she lost her son named Ryan who was 24 yrs. old. Ryan was my nephew's name and he too was 24. Heaven has gained some fine young angels in these men. I know, as you surely do, they are looking down watching over us and keeping us safe. Time will not take away the pain but it will make it easier to endure. I sincerely pray your journey through grief is easy.

I totally agree with you. May we all feel peace and our loved ones close by!

so sorry for you loss. I too have losses. I wish you peace and hope you can b happy again