Bereavement Support Group
Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Whether you lost someone recently or it's been years, grief and its accompanying emotions can be complicated to cope with. Join our online support group to connect with a supportive group of people who really know how you feel. Help is right here.
Hi everyone,
I found this grief group today and I wanted to share what I am going through, if anyone has suggestions on how to get through grief a little easier it would be much appreciated.
So here is my story.
Three weeks ago I found out that my friend's mother died from cancer, as I knew my friend's mom since I was I was a little girl. When I first heard the news I was in a state of shock. I am taking it hard but I know I will get through this. As for my friend I reached out to her to let her know I was there for her but she hasn't responded. I was hoping that we could get through this together, but it looks like she has her own way of grieving the loss and I am giving her space, while trying to take care of myself.
What makes it harder is that last october one of my friend's passed away unexpectedly, months after the death of my pet bird, and in 2014 my other bird died, so what I am trying to say is that the losses are happening almost yearly- at least it feels that way, and on top of that my aunt has stage four cancer.
I'm trying to get through this the best I can, but it hurts so much. So which is why I have joined this site. I hope someone can give me a suggestion or two on how to make this a bit easier on me I would greatly appreciate it.
Much love to everyone going through a hard time right now.
I found this grief group today and I wanted to share what I am going through, if anyone has suggestions on how to get through grief a little easier it would be much appreciated.
So here is my story.
Three weeks ago I found out that my friend's mother died from cancer, as I knew my friend's mom since I was I was a little girl. When I first heard the news I was in a state of shock. I am taking it hard but I know I will get through this. As for my friend I reached out to her to let her know I was there for her but she hasn't responded. I was hoping that we could get through this together, but it looks like she has her own way of grieving the loss and I am giving her space, while trying to take care of myself.
What makes it harder is that last october one of my friend's passed away unexpectedly, months after the death of my pet bird, and in 2014 my other bird died, so what I am trying to say is that the losses are happening almost yearly- at least it feels that way, and on top of that my aunt has stage four cancer.
I'm trying to get through this the best I can, but it hurts so much. So which is why I have joined this site. I hope someone can give me a suggestion or two on how to make this a bit easier on me I would greatly appreciate it.
Much love to everyone going through a hard time right now.
Secondly, I am very sorry that you need this group. I'm also sorry that I need this group, but am happy to have met the people here.
I think that the first thing to learn is that we all handle grief differently. A loss that hits me hard may only be a minor issue for you, and a huge loss for you may not hit me at all.
From this I have learned not to expect a lot of support from people who simply can not identify with my loss. Instead look for people who either have suffered a similar loss (and the same problem dealing with it) or look for people who are more open to your loss.
Let yourself grieve! More and more experts are backing off from the concept of stages of grief. That seems to imply that there is a set order of these stages and that once you process a stage you are done and ready for the next stage. The reality is that we get hit with a lot of emotions as we try to accept the loss. Sometimes we can deal with an emotion just fine, other times we need a LOT OF TIME to do that.
Talking can be GREAT to help us through this. But finding the right people, and expressing yourself in a way they can handle is important.
Grieving classes can be wonderful! Many hospitals have classes to help people who have lost a family member or close friend. Can you find such a class?
Don't be afraid to get professional help! It is their job to adapt to your needs.
Sorry to go on and on!
Gentle hugs
I think I am all talked out at this point, but I am slowly getting through it, and thanks for your response that I found to be very helpful.I prefer to handle this as gently as possible and I am so thankful that I found this group. I think I just needed to write it out one more time and share it.
It just came into my mind to search for an online support group as it is very hard for me to get out physically as I have a physical disability.
Thank you for your suggestions :) And I wish you well as you go forward in coping with your loss.
It helps me feel better to know I am not alone. Thank you for responding.
As far as your friend, thank you for wanting and trying to help her. Many of us have friends that fell off the earth after a loss and that is hard. I would say keep in contact maybe every other day, even if it's a call or a text to say you're thinking about her. Don't make it an obligation for her to return the call. Just say you're thinking about her and hope she is doing OK and you will check on her soon.
I have learned that grievers need to be selfish and isolated for a while. If she does contact you be prepared to only want to talk about her loss. It's not about trying to "get her mind off it" but I think you know that already. I think that's why people tend to avoid those who don't understand the loss. Some people think that they should call you up and ramble about random things to make you "forget" or think about something else. Impossible to forget that someone you loved died.