Hi ~ I know what you mean. How long has Bruce been gone? If it's only been a couple/three years or so, I can completely understand. It's just too soon. I couldn't even BEGIN to think of anything like that at that stage. My dear hubby has been gone almost 8 years now, and for ME I've just decided I prefer to stay single. Yes, I still love my husband, but it's not just that. It's the whole dating thing ~ I'm just not up to it anymore but I'm sure I'm older than you.

I think you probably just need more time, dearheart. Everyone grieves in their own timeline. One person may be able to 'move on' much sooner than another. I suspect it's just too soon for you. Give yourself more time, and you'll know when you're ready to open your heart again. Just take care of YOU. God bless. Hugs, Lee

I don't think it is wrong to be in love with your husband. My husband has been gone almost 13 months now. I feel like my love for him grows each day. I also wonder if that healthy, I know that I am not ready to let go of my husband either. I still haven't taken his clothes out of the closet or his dresser yet. I just can't. As for the thought of anyone new in my life I question my own feelings and the whole singles thing is pretty scary too. Don't be to hard on yourself. Just take your time. Hugs Denise

You can never forget a true love. However, life does go on, whether we like it or not. Hold him deep in your heart and begin to reach out to others. He would want you to move on. You will never truly leave him, but you can add others into your life.

You will always love your husband. My husband died 6/2007 but he is still with me in spirit. I also plan on remaining single, because it is what I want. So can you. Let me just ask you to remain open to what comes into your life. You can add more friends, be a support to others, and lead a full life. you will never stop missing him but you will find peace in having been blessed with him. Sharon

I'm like you, except I lost my parents, my Mom last Jan. and my Dad in Oct.. When everyone tells me to "move on", what that sounds like to me is "leave them behind" and I can't do that. I know that's not what they mean, but it's what it feels like to me. What's helped me, though, is coming here and writing with people who understand that feeling and can sympathize with me. You're not alone by a long shot. There are so many of us going through this. Keep writing. It does help.

How could it possibly be wrong to still love your husband... Why would you stop? I know that if my husband passed, I would have a hard time of it, a really hard time... but I know that if I passed away, I would want him to have a full and happy life... I wouldn't want him to stop living because I did. I guess when the time is right you may find somebody, and that doesn't mean you would have to be looking... somebody who can be there for you but still not your Bruce...When and if it's meant to be.. it will be.. and that's okay.. and if it's not to be... then that's okay to... Only time will tell... Never say never!!!!

Didn't loose a husband so don't really understand that pain...I think that when you are ready for another relationship you'll know, it will feel right. Until then don't stress, take care of yourself.

You're feelings are natural. There are widows/widowers that never "move on." Hate to sound gloomy- but don't think of it as something that you have to do. There are many that divorce and never date/remarry. You already found the love of your life, for most people there's only one of love! Be happy in the fact that you did him, some people never do. So if you do find someone else to start a relationship with, that's fine but far from a neccessity.

I would assume its just not time for you to move on yet. I lost my sister not a husband so its not the same, but I know I could never or wouldn't want to replace her and won't have to. So I can't imagine the position your in with a husband or mate people push you to move on and its got to be the hardest thing ever to push past that. I think you have to do what's right for you, but just know you will never ever replace him he's one of a kind in your heart. But there may be room for love again someday:)

I lost my husband 24 years ago and still love him so much. I have his pictures all over the house. When its the anniverary of his death I get so depressed and cry all the time. I do have a bf, we have been together for 20 years but I could never marry him,its like we are just dating. I had only 1 husband and he still is my husband. I still love him so much and the pain is so bad, its like he just died. I don't believe its been that long, we had a daughter and he missed out on seeing how beautiful she is. But then sometimes I feel like he can see us, he is w/us. I have a new life w/ my bf but I have never let go of my husband or my love for him. So I understand what you are going through, I am going through the same thing. I was confused too for many years, then one day I just said I will keep loving him and stop fighting the love and pain. Just because he died doesn't mean that our love died. So I just said I will keep on loving him and remember our times and our love. He is part of my life, I talk to him all the time. So its not wrong to still love him, I will always love my husband, death did not take the love away