Bereavement Support Group

Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Whether you lost someone recently or it's been years, grief and its accompanying emotions can be complicated to cope with. Join our online support group to connect with a supportive group of people who really know how you feel. Help is right here.

3,877 Members
13,418 Posts
0 Online
Death & Dying
/ Bereavement Support Group

I am lost

godisawesom
godisawesom
my friend was found unresponsive when the ambulance picked him up and he arrived at the hospital the docters said he had a massive brain hemmorrage the docters put him on life support after 2 days they said he was brain dead it just seems like everything happen so fast i felt that the docters did not do all they could have he was taken off life support i felt really upset about that but if i knew then what i know now if a person is on life support and they are brain dead can they live with out the machine i know it meant be a crazy question but i needed some answers thank you
deleted_user
deleted_user
first, breathe. see if it's possible to talk with your friend's MD's, to have some of your more medically -oriented questions answered. if you can't, call your local hospice (if you don't have one,google the word - you'll find a resource) and see if you can get some answers. a couple thoughts of my own - as far as i know, a person cannot continue to live if taken off life support - perhaps a couple of minutes. "life support" means the person cannot breathe on their own, and are on a ventilator - a machine that simply pumps air in, and let's it out. so, taking him off....'brain dead' means there is no activity in the person's brain.. for all intents and purposes, the person you obviously loved so dearly, was gone. he wasn't breathing, and he had no working brain cells. may sound callous - but it's like the lights are on (only bcs of a machine) and no one is home. he might also have had a Living Will on file, meaning he stated he did not want to be kept alive by any artificial methods. my mother had a living will. she died of cancer at home, tended to (in addition to her family) by hospice. it was very, very hard to let her go, to not insist she be placed in a hospital. we honored her wishes. she was a very intelligent, vital woman who made a fully informed decision at a time when she was healthy. no question you ask about death, the greatest mystery of all, is 'crazy'.
deleted_user
deleted_user
It isn't crazy.

It's part of life.

It's something that sometimes happens to families..to people....

You feel all this pain...losing someone you love.......
But it happens...Boot did a good job explaining things..My father was on a respirator in a coma after his stroke and he never woke up and one day he was lying there dead...the doctor had come in and sneaked away to his room and they had shut everything off and he was lying there dead..I was 17 years old at the time.
You feel all this pain...
Years later my mom is dead and my wife is dead as well...
So you learn what happened and you know and people tell you you hav e to move on and some can and some can't...
Talk to others to help yourself understand and accept this ...much as you dislike it....

Take care friend...