I have two beautiful daughters, 16 and 9. They are so special to me. But on 10 April 2018 my son was stillborn at 17 weeks. I've had 5 miscarriages, but they were all early in my pregnancies. My son, Ken, was stillborn. This feels so different. Its been 2 months and I still feel like I'm never going to recover. My husband doesn't want to talk about him. And somehow it feels too personal to talk to other people. I went to the appointment alone, I had a bad feeling that morning. I was alone through the delivery, and recovered at home. I’m so used to pretending that I’m fine, I’m not sure I know what I feel anymore, aside from the dull throbbing where my soul used to be. But I can’t say that. I can’t say that every morning I wake up with the realisation that a part of me died and the thought that maybe I should have too. Words like pain, emptiness, loss, despair, they lose their meaning in the face of what I feel when I look at the only picture I have of him. People keep telling me that the grief will lessen with time. But I can't see how. Everyone expects me to be back to normal. But I have no idea what normal is anymore. How do I live the rest of my life like this? How do I raise my daughters with this shadow on my heart? How do I tell my friends and family that I'm still not ok? I feel like I have to justify it.
Hi everyone.I just joined after desperately goggling for info and support.Im having excrutiating anxiety, panic and flashbacks.Im alone and could use support from those who understand the hell Im experiencing.I have pets and must ride this out by myself.I tried to talk to my pastor who just doesnt get it.Thank you . All i want to do is breathe
hello, I am 21 years old and I’m currently unemployed. In the past I haven’t had any successful relationships and I’ve been hurt by many guys at a young age. For a while I was reckless and I wanted to feel good about myself no matter what negative affect it had on others. I slept around with a lot of guys in hopes of being wanted. In hopes of finally having a successful relationship. The...