Bereavement Support Group
Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Whether you lost someone recently or it's been years, grief and its accompanying emotions can be complicated to cope with. Join our online support group to connect with a supportive group of people who really know how you feel. Help is right here.
Those who have attended Grief Support Groups locally, may have been advised (during the early stages of loss) to keep a journal of daily thoughts addressed about or to our loved ones.
However, I learned that email proved to be the most emotional, day-by-day factual accounts of what Mom or I experienced. I saved the many emails I'd sent to friends and family during the time that Mama fell and was hospitalized (a number of times). My emails continued right up to her last day and the night of her passing. After her passing, after she was taken from the house, I sat down at my computer and began to email the news - just as I'd emailed news of her condition each evening after returning home from various hospital stays. (I don't remember sleeping after Mama died - but I have a record - those emails before I just sat in the dark by Mama's window, next to where she died.)
The emails (some 19 months' worth) proved to be so revealing - how Mama reacted during hospital stays, her medical / emotional state, the difficulties we faced once home, details I'd forgotten - things I was experiencing alone. I'd forgotten so much - I relived it as I read - but Mama wasn't in the next room or nearby hospital this time.
I could never eliminate those communications - they're more accurate an account than any memory - any medical record. Tonight, some of them brought a tear to my eye. I'd forgotten what I went through. My poor Mom. Does she know now all I was going through FOR her - but without her?
I was wondering if anyone here did similar during or after the time you were losing loved ones?
However, I learned that email proved to be the most emotional, day-by-day factual accounts of what Mom or I experienced. I saved the many emails I'd sent to friends and family during the time that Mama fell and was hospitalized (a number of times). My emails continued right up to her last day and the night of her passing. After her passing, after she was taken from the house, I sat down at my computer and began to email the news - just as I'd emailed news of her condition each evening after returning home from various hospital stays. (I don't remember sleeping after Mama died - but I have a record - those emails before I just sat in the dark by Mama's window, next to where she died.)
The emails (some 19 months' worth) proved to be so revealing - how Mama reacted during hospital stays, her medical / emotional state, the difficulties we faced once home, details I'd forgotten - things I was experiencing alone. I'd forgotten so much - I relived it as I read - but Mama wasn't in the next room or nearby hospital this time.
I could never eliminate those communications - they're more accurate an account than any memory - any medical record. Tonight, some of them brought a tear to my eye. I'd forgotten what I went through. My poor Mom. Does she know now all I was going through FOR her - but without her?
I was wondering if anyone here did similar during or after the time you were losing loved ones?
I do have some text messages on my phone from the few days he was in hospital,I've kept all the ones I sent and received those few days.I have also kept the lovely msgs I recieved from everyone in those weeks after it all happened. I do find it impossible to look at any of them,still feels so unreal but i definitely plan to keep them.
I do write loads and hold onto every message,email,post throughout this journey,maybe someday I'll be able to look back on them,it's just too painful and raw still.
((hugs))to you
DG
Also, like you, I saved all the emails I sent out to friends telling them what happened. I also wrote a letter to my sister everyday for several months, my way of journaling. I have everything I've written and now, when I read them, I realize I have come a long way. Not to ignore the fact that I still have a long way to go, but I've made progress on this journey of grief.
"We can't come to the phone right now...", etc. "WE" because Mama was still here - even though she was bedridden in that room. You can hear the Aide's voice in the background. After Mama was gone, I couldn't change it. The essence of her living presence feet away was there. She was in the same room at the time. I can't erase it, and it still plays as it did in 2007.