Bereavement Support Group
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Every Dec.-Jan., right before my brother died, in 2007, I feel little anxiety attacks, pins and needles in my wrists and general fatigue and discomfort, followed by the big let-down January 31 when he passed, whereupon I feel a sigh of relief, but then the inevitable pain of loss ensues. This isn't going to get any better until I find a warm, special friend to relax and pass this time with. I try to meditate on him and Jesus and find a way to push through it, but it always surfaces.
Anyone else relate?
Anyone else relate?
Im new here and I honestly dont mean to be rude to you, but thats just wrong thinking.
Every one here has lost someone the deeply loved.
i just lost my wife feb 7th completely unexpected sudden cardiac death and I also am having some troubling PTSD symptoms.
If anyone were to suggest to me that I need a "warm special friend" to help me through i honestly think I would snap their heads off.
You...and i for sure...need therapy, not what you suggest.
im really sorry for your loss and Im sorry that im a little offended.
I just cant imagine what youre implying.
I woke up to find Kathy dead. She died several hours earlier.
Ever since i find I can not see her face in my memories of her. i can recall the touch of her skin, her hair, her kiss. i can recall how she smelled. i can see her arm, or shoulder or neck. i can not see her face no matter how hard i try. I have to keep her pictures everywhere or else I can not see her face. And I adore her to the marrow of her bones. I simply love that woman as much as i know how to love anyone..but i can not see her face.
i seem to have blocked it from my mind because i struggle at all hours of the night trying to push out of my mind how she looked when I last saw her. i struggle in torment with that image and great exaggerations of that image leaping out at me.
i cry myself to sleep. i am in anguish and torment and cannot see my wifes face.
Last night i felt my heart racing, pounding in my chest and i became afraid to fall asleep. i began to think that i would not wake up and that, as much as i thought i wanted to die, i still have to pay for her headstone. So i was afraid to die in my sleep as she had and that filled me with guilt that I clung to life after praying so hard that God would just take me to her.
so, yes, I can relate and i really am sorry that i am so sensitive and remarked somewhat rudely to you. im sorry you are also in pain.
I'm so sorry for your loss. It must be so hard to lose a sibling...especially when you're so close to them. I WOULD understand the importance of having a sibling, since I don't have any.
I really don't know if I understand PTSD properly, but I'm going through a major trauma right now, having lost my mom suddenly to cerebral attack. She was my best friend and left me all alone. There isn't a single second in a day that I don't think of her. Sleep seems to be my only refuge.
It's only been a month and two days and I don't know how am I supposed to spend a lifetime without her.
We all want a special friend, who would understand our needs and give us the comfort we once had with people we lost. You're not alone there. Best of luck to you. I wish you all the happiness in the world.
@nobody4now , we all understand what you're going through. Please don't be sorry about expressing your opinions. We're like a big family on this board and we all care about each other. If you disagree with someone, that's just you, I found nothing rude on your post. Hope you're doing okay?
Hugs to both of you. Please hang in there.
As fro ptsd, I've been told I suffer from a certain level of ptsd. i didn't find my sister like you did nobody4now and Jhelum. I'm glad i didn't. I remember the last time i spent time with my sister in her home. i can remember that, but then immediately it seems my mind goes to that night she was murdered. i picture it in my mind. the fear, the terror, the blood, the screams. i was in that house 7 weeks after her murder. i saw what crime scene investigations look like. we didn't see the bathroom she was found in. that door remained closed. i did see the darkness of fingerprint dusting everywhere in her once bright and beautiful home. i did see the bedroom door splintered from the door frame. and that's what i remember. i could go on and on about how this has affected me, but i'm not up for it today. 24 weeks ago tonight sometime, it all happened.
i'm sorry for all of our losses.
Shirley