Bereavement Support Group

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Death & Dying
/ Bereavement Support Group

loneliness

lutie1
lutie1
I've only been widowed 6months but it seems like it's getting harder. Nothing is settled even as far as where I will live and feel like I'm going crazy with decisions. I am really struggling with the loneliness , afraid to feel those emotions of being alone. I'll probably get a room mate albeit a male but a friend for 40 years. Does this sound terrible. nothing romantic.
Community LeaderThePepperMan
ThePepperMan
First of all I am so very sorry for your loss. So far in my life I have lost grandparents (and others from their generation), parents (and others from their generation) and my sister (nobody else from "my" generation that I was close to).

So no way can I imagine the loss of a spouse.

There is a group here for widows and widowers. I'm not trying to push you away, far from it! There is no limit to the number of groups you can join here other than having enough time to get something out of each group. Please consider joining that group in addition to the ones you are already part of. They have a LOT of experience with issues associated with the loss of a spouse where as we here are more focused on general losses of family members.

Kind of a two shot support system!

It takes time to settle things. I have found that some law firms can provide you with a representative who will process as much of the paperwork as you want to pay them to process. That can take a huge burden off your back, but it comes at a $$ cost.

I agree, getting a room mate sounds like a good idea.

Do you have children/grand children? They might get upset at a male room mate, so to avoid problems you might work on letting them know about that.

But it is your life, and I say GO FOR IT!
lutie1
lutie1
Yes, I have family and they want what's best for me. It's just deciding what that is. I will look up the widow and widowers group. Thanks
hollowheart
hollowheart
I'm also sorry for your loss. I lost my sister and she was my sole social connection so I can sympathize with the loniliness and paperwork also. I have yet to close her bank account or close other things. I have simply been ignoring bills that come in her name. It's so hard to get her mail and not be able to go give it to her like I used to.

I think a roommate is a good idea, but don't push yourself to do anything unless it's dire straights that you need to move asap. Right now you are lonely, but consider do you really want someone else living with you or do you just want/need a friend and companionship?

It was suggested to me I get a roommate when I move (I'm living at home) but I know I don't want a roommate. I just want someone I can socialize with, and be there when I want to hang out. I miss talking and feeling connected and laughing and having someone to do things with. Please let us know how things are going.