Bereavement Support Group
Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Whether you lost someone recently or it's been years, grief and its accompanying emotions can be complicated to cope with. Join our online support group to connect with a supportive group of people who really know how you feel. Help is right here.
I joined this site with hopes of getting advice and knowing how others have dealt with the loss of loved ones. My father passed away 6 months ago in a couple weeks. He was sick my whole life with pancreatitis and over time had more health issues. He unfortunately was a smoker and had COPD. For the last couple of years he was using oxygen and was very frail from minimal appetite. In March he had chest pain and went to the hospital. His heart was failing, but he was so skinny and frail they were nervous to do any operation. At one point, I think he had a panic attack and couldn't breathe, so they intubated him. When we visited, the doctors said he had probably a week left, which is not what we expected to hear. He stayed in the ICU for about a week and a half and we made the decision to have him come home on hospice care. I lived at home with my parents and with no doubt wanted him home because I knew he would be happiest and that's what he deserved and what we wanted as well. My mother took a leave of absence from work to take care of him and then I would help when I got home from work and on the weekends. Over the summer we watched him get worse and he slept more and more. He was bedridden this entire time which made it very difficult. He passed away in July at the age of 69. We were told so many times that he probably had 2 weeks left, but my Dad was such a fighter and made it 4 months once he was home on hospice care. I know he never wanted to let us down or see us upset so he tried his absolute best.
Over the past few months, it seems to have gotten harder for me, but many people say it gets easier. I know getting through the holidays was tough for sure, but I am wondering when that time will come for me. I know it's also different for everyone too.
Even though it was so hard to see my Dad the way he was, I am grateful for the extra time I had with him and was able to cherish every moment. I made sure to take pictures, videos and have no words left unsaid. I miss him so much and have really been struggling thinking how much time I have left in my life I will never see him again or get to talk to him.
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
People grieve for different lengths of time.... I still find the holidays hard sometimes..... If you can find a support group in RL it may be a good and healthy way to let your feelings out and gain support....
The agency you had hospice care for would probably know of one or if you have a faith they may be able to give you some direction.... There are MeetUp's if you're in the US for grief.
DS is a good site.... I'm glad you've found us.... Another hug and a blessing....xo
The stages of grief can be real hard. I think of them as the emotions of grief, that somehow makes it easier for me to navigate my feelings.
There is an interesting concept, they call it the "new normal". I think that this is what we are looking for when we lose somebody really close to us. You can find your new normal; it will be different, from my experience it is best to not worry about it being better or worse than my old normal. Just different.
gentle hugs
We kind of experienced a new normal for a few months when my Dad was home on hospice, but I agree that now there will be another new normal. Being quite young losing my father (I was very close to him), I struggle to think of what else I have to accomplish in my life that he won't be here for; if I get married, have kids, etc. I've also found it tough to be happy for others when things have been so hard for me and I become distant at times. Have either of you experienced that?
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross has written some wonderful books on death and dying.... It talks about stages of grief and we may go through all of them or some of them... We can get 'stuck' in one of the stages... She was an amazing physician.... I studied her text book in nursing and she also wrote for anyone who is going through the pain of grief... Big hug.....xo
I am so sorry for your loss. I know people say that time heals all wounds, and I don't know if the pain will ever fully go away, but I think it will eventually lessen. I lost my grandmother six years ago, and still miss her everyday. I was very close with her, and spent a lot of time with her growing up. I am so grateful for our time together (she was 92 years old), and that she was able to spend time with my three children. When she first passed, my grief was so heavy and overwhelming. I relied on my faith to see me through. Six years later, I can tell you that my heart is still heavy, but not as overwhelmed as I once was feeling. I am able to remember and I work to keep her memory alive with my children.
I hoe this encourages you today. Reaching out through this group is a good way to gain support, and you will also encourage others through sharing your story. You are in my thoughts and prayers today Kim...just take it one day at a time.