So sorry for your loss. The only thing I can say is that you have to live one day at a time. Your Mom wants you to be happy and live YOUR life to the fullest. Always remember the love and it is still there just in a different way. She is near you and you will honor her by living!!!
Blessings to you

thanks so much

hi, its been 4 yrs for me, still hurt, one day at a time

My best advice would be to be gentle with yourself. I lost my dad over two years ago and have run the gamut of loss, depression, anxiety, grief and guilt and beat myself up endlessly. "what's wrong with me that I can't get past this...etc" Let yourself feel what you need to feel and when things get really rough, talk to us here or go to your support network. I'm sorry there is no easy answer, I wish there were because I'd be sharing it all over the place here, but there are lots of us that understand loss and are willing to help and listen. :)

I lost my mom 22 yrs ago at age 60. It did get easier but it took time. You'll get there but you will need patience to go thru the acute grief period. Hugs Beth

I am so very sorry for your loss. But, I do understand, that at this point "I'm sorry" is far too oftenly said to you and you are tired of it.

I hope that you find this place as a helpful avenue to express your feelings. I lost my dad 6 months ago. It's horrible to lose a parent. It makes you feel like life loses value, like there is no support left for you in this world...

Hang in there. We are all here for you.

I do know what you are going through as I just lost my mother to cancer 3 weeks ago. I was used to talking to my mom about 4 times a day, so what I do is still talk to her out loud when I can...like on car rides to work.
I've now assigned "fill ins" for people I call for certain things (like I said, I would call my mom for everything!), for example, I now call my brother when I have an update about my 2yr old - dr apt or something, I call my best friend with the daily complaint about the dumb stuff like the family making a mess right after the house gets cleaned. Just something that simple has helped me from feeling bottled up like I was for a while.
Everyone wants to help, and I don't know how else to let them, but I do know the more I talk about the other "dumb" stuff, it at least releases that stress from adding to the other thoughts deep in my mind at this time.
I have just made a lunch date with my friend too, because that will get me out of the house but I will not feel obligated to be out long if it is not a good day, but hey you never know if by getting out may make it a better day...so just try!
The best to you at this time and just keep writing, or reading at least. I was surprised at the feeling I felt from this site!

thanks so much for the support and kind words it means alot to me im just so sad for saturday is when we have her memorial i know it will hit me hard that she is gone and what makes it bad is that she lived with me for 12 yrs im just glad shes not suffering nomore that cancer is so evil god bless u all hugsssssssssssss