I don't understand; where in the Christian faith, the Bible, does it say you're not supposed to see your loved ones? Is Jesus holding them so tightly to his bussom that they're nowhere to be seen? I don't think so. I've seen my departed brother many times. In one dream, he was driving a truck on a long road trip and wanted me there, so I was there. In another, he was helping others cross over. God is love, he doesn't like his loved ones separated from one another, and he WANTS us to see our loved ones. Relish that time in dreams...guilt-free!

Now I'm scouring the Bible looking for such a passage. I consider myself a spiritual person and a student of all religions...without subscribing wholeheartedly to any one religion. I do read the Bible regularly. It has a lot of good info about the human heart as well as the great mysteries we're all trying to understand. I'm sure there is something in the Bible to the effect of they're with Jesus, who is seated at the right hand of the Father...but that doesn't mean God is a hoarder. He's very generous with His love, including the loved ones He created for us. I think He allows us "glimpses" into the other side, the majesty of His creation, every night when we go to sleep, when we "die" to our conscious selves, and dream. When we finally depart our bodies, our eyes will finally see the full splendor of the great beyond and feel its love. But for now, we're afforded "glimpses", as much as He knows we can handle.

I'm looking and looking in the Bible...and this question of whether we are supposed to see our loved ones in dreams remains unanswered. This is one reason I find religion, as written in texts, narrow and limiting. The Bible does say in John 3, right before Revelations, that God is l ove. We must therefore surmise that we must trust and follow love in any form. I think God IS showing you love by allowing you to commune with your loved ones. Rejoice! You're being touched by the Divine!

Sorry if this was a long diatribe, Rachel. Hope it helped.

Hi Rachel,

For me, when I lost my fiance many years ago, joining a grief group helped me a lot. I developed camaraderie and friendships I never would have imagined. I felt I had found an extended family. It was really wonderful. Can you imagine looking forward to going to a grief group every week?! But it helped me so much. I took an anti anxiety medication in those days too, and it helped smooth my panic a lot. I have a feeling it's connecting with others that may help you feel like going on. Would attending church help? I have a cat, too, who does a lot for me feeling like I have someone to come home to! He is my little family in many ways! I've had weekend where I'd feel hideously alone and depressed. Just going out and making contact with another person helped me feel like I was "part of" rather than so entirely alone. Just the few words of chat with a cashier at the grocery store helped me feel like I was not in isolation. It helped me!

Rachel, please accept my sincere condolences to you. It must be devastating to lose every member of your family. I am so lucky to have sisters and a brother, my mom's 2nd husband who I call Father, and some extended family still. I know I am very very lucky. I cannot imagine how it must be to be the last one in your family. I say adopt a secondary family in friends, members of your congregation, us here!, a pet or pets, wherever you feel that good feeling of support and caring. We all need that so deeply.

Sending you a big warm hug and strength for each day,
Kathy