Asperger Syndrome Support Group
Asperger syndrome - also referred to as Asperger's syndrome, Asperger's, Aspergers or just AS - is one of five neurobiological pervasive developmental disorders (PDD), and is characterized by deficiencies in social and communication skills, normal to above normal intelligence, and standard language development.
I have aspegers syndrome and recentlty my wife injured herself and I find myself in a situation to be her caretaker and this goes against my natural strengths. I find it very difficult to take care of people. I don't knpow if this is normal or not but it it very traumatizing for me to hear her cry from pain. Things are getting much better now but the first two days were traumatizing for me, she cried a few times and when this happens I am overwhelmed and have a very hard time showing any kind of sympathy. It's like i freeze and i fear that I appear to be unsympathetic. I don't know what to say and physically being affectionate and comforting is unnatural for me. I also got frustrated and got angry with her. Luckily the anger wasn't out of hand or eggregious. The last few days have been much better for me though as I just needed a little time to adjust to the new role. The change of routine was difficult, I had to leave work mid shift, take the next day off as well, go back to work for a day and then my weekend came. I am doing pretty well now and am very happy that my anger wasn't much worse as I could have done major damage to our relationship. Does anyone else react strongly when seeing a loved one in a lot of pain, or hearing them cry? Anyone relate to how I react?
You clearly love your wife very much, and anyone in your situation would find things difficult. Asperger's may make things harder, but you can also recognize that you're doing a good job and that this situation would be hard for anyone. It might be helpful to tell your wife how Asperger's is making this situation a little more difficult and emphasize that you are there for her, even if you don't always clearly show sympathy.
You guys are in this situation together, and even though it won't be easier, you'll make it through. Please stay on this board and let us know how you and your wife are doing.
it's December 30th and everything went pretty well as far as my wifes recovery goes. We both handled it very well and we both feel as if this was a bonding experience for the both of us. My wife thinks I did great. She is driving again and we are going on a short trip tomorrow. She is still healing but doing great and I am proud of her for her tenacity and mildly proud of my own growth and patience that I showed these last 3 weeks.