Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Today is the zoom court hearing regarding custody of my 3 orphaned grandchildren. As of November 3rd, at the end of the District Attorney's extensive effort to mediate a settlement between The State and the two families, there was reason to believe this court date would be cancelled in favor of the mediated settlement. My departed son's in-laws failed to sign off on their portion of the mediated settlement. The court session now has to run its Corona modified routine. It is unknown whether this is because of incompetance or yet another in-court ambush. There is ample history to support both possibilities.
Breathing. . . Venting. . . Plying anxiety management tools. . .
Having his children taken into protective custody in October, 2018 was the greatest shame of my departed son's life. A family of his own was all my gentle son ever wanted out of life. I believe that was true for his wife, as well, but, in fact, I did not know her well. The two of us were not the exception to the MIL/DIL stereotypes. The children were still in protective custody when the romantic duo died on September 21st, 2019. Today's court hearing is a direct link in that unfortunate series of events. Hubby and I so want closure on all of that, buttttttaaaaa. . .
God's will be done.
Again I leave the mood icon on the rapid cycling median.
Zoom, zoom. . .
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I did the dumbest thing today. I charged my earbuds, unplugged the block and put the block in my little bag instead of the earbuds. I wasn't happy about that when I got to the gym. What a dummy!
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Ever since I stopped doing therapy because of insurance, I've been feeling that old tense and irritable sense of anxiety and stress. I hate that. I was making so many strides and changes during therapy, my therapist would acknowledge all of my progress and accomplishments, and I miss that reassurance. Today I thought about it, and I made those changes! She would always tell me that I chose to...
As I have heard in every branch my non-traditional career, "Assumption is the father of all f___ups." I am grateful I didn't act on the assumption. Working myself into an anxious lather could count as action, but I think I'll leave that debate be for now.
Hubby had been so touchy all weekend and I assumed it was anxiety over the zoom court proceedings. It certainly was for me. Enough so that I didn't feel safe discussing it with him. We do trigger one another mightily on matters of the heart. That is often a good thing, but the misfires are ? ? ? Colorful?
During this morning's planning session, Hubs informed me that the problem had been resolved on Friday. The in-laws signed off on the mediated settlement.
Turns out Hubby's anxiety was over the financial yaddahs of our estranged but still financially dependent 40 year old son. Business as usual there and mostly between the two men. ES has known better than to ask me for money for quite allot of years. I'm not okay with the estrangement but it feels like the safer poison.
Different psycho snot knot, entirely. . .
What a long, strange trip it's been.
Trying to keep the LOL on the LFL.