there must be a social agency for anonymous tips. How sad for the kids and what a nasty position to put you in!!!

Good luck and bless you for caring

I am going to give you my opinion only but it is up to you as to what your heart and your gut are telling you to do. If it was me, I would turn her in to children's social services. No child should be denied an education, especially by a parent. The 20 year old is going to have to find a way to get an education which is possible by taking a GED and there are classes to help with that. As for the 2 that are underage, they need help. A child cannot function in this world with knowing how to read and write. I am very worried, as you are, about these kids. Hugs GB

These kids are in trouble. Like Gramy says, they'll not be able to function. Your friend's daughter has no values; our first concern is to be for those children.. I cringe when imagining where they could wind up. Oy . !!!!

Of course I worry that you and your friend could possibly lose each other. What's right is right however; in the long run she'll understand.

I admire your tackling this serious problem. . . good health to you

Thank you for your replies. I am going to get a cheap prepaid phone to call with and make the report Anonymous. I'll start with the states department of education. Maybe they will talk to them and get them in school some how. If not I guess child services would be next. Thanks again.

anyone who is homeschooled is supposed to be monitored by the state board of education. local school systems are also notified of anyone who is homeschooled because assessments must be done to make sure that the parents are doing their job.

In our state the only thing they do is have the parent fill out some kind of progress report and maybe send in some kind of test which can be easily falsified.

I think you are doing the right thing. Too many people want to "mind their own business", and that is why so much abuse is gotten away with. This is outright neglect and makes no sense. What is wrong w public school, it costs her nothing!

One might look on the Web site of state board of education. Looking for home school, and then looking to see if anything is said about enforcement.

Perhaps do Google questions or Google searches on the subject. We had a county commissioner of schools. Maybe no one there would want to get involved; but then again...

My own personal pattern is to write things down and document. Maybe you'd want to have a list. No names need be attached to quotes you hear from neighbors.

Do not be disheartened by one person saying, "no, we are not going to invade their privacy." Or, " that's not our area." Bureaucrats..., pffffttt.

keep up the fight, . :)

As a homeschooler, being reported needlessly was such an anxiety trigger and I suffered needlessly. I hope youll consider my comments with that in mind.

A quick Google search or visit to HSLDA.org (home school legal defense association) will show sad examples of families harmed by false reports. Two children here were removed from their home, their fathers career threatened, family finances drained by legal fees for no reason.

The cost emotionally and otherwise is huge when the state gets involved. PLEASE BE SURE.

IMO, Its too easy to be an anonymous tipster. I think its cruel. If you cant say it to your friends face then maybe you should reconsider?

Dont call if you dont ask.

Surely your friend cares about her grandchildren & can ask them to address an envelope or read who sent her mail? That would be a discussion starter. If she wont ask, why dont you? Its not unusual to ask - my kids were/are asked all the time about school, favorite subjects, career aspirations.

You said one is 20 an adult - another is 15, cant they talk about their favorite subjects or job goals?

Its hard to believe no doctor, nurse, librarian, clergy, or other professional with a duty-to-report isnt aware of these kids. My kids have been quizzed by a doctor about math calculations, by a neighbor who wanted to know how they socialize, by librarians making conversation as we checked out stacks of books on a particular era or topic.

Have you asked their mother or your friend about how homeschooling works? Just be curious. Most experienced homeschoolers can easily share state law, homeschool support groups, curriculum options, etc. Heck, I even provide homework resource ideas for the staff at my pain doctors office.

If the mother doesnt know or wont answer you or her own mother (your friend), maybe there's reason to be more suspicious.

But right now Im not sure you know enough to draw conclusions.

If after you ask the questions you feel this young adult, teen, and child are being neglected, maybe you could consider what would help them most. Maybe theres a homeschool support group at their church? Maybe the pastor can get involved? Maybe a librarian knows if another experienced homeschooler knows the family or can put them in touch with other homeschoolers?

Im sorry this is so long. Im in a lot of pain and having computer problems and have typed responses only to lose them.... so this is overkill. But I hope you can see my heart just wants to help and I care. I wouldnt want to see anyone hurt nor any child neglected. I hope my rambling helps some.