are you two living alone together or are there any more persons in the household, what ages and what relationship do they have with you.

She lived here for 1 month & she went into a SNF & that is where she has been. My husband & 2 children have been very supportive. She is in a really good place but wants to leave before her physical therapy is done. She cannot walk or use her left arm. She wants to go home to her place but she can't care for herself.

one of the things that scares most a kid is to feel their parents do not love them or do not approve of them. saying it like this does not begin to express what these feelings feel like. you are the new cowboy in town and are drinking in the bar and your father comes in, he is the sheriff. looks at you like "you should not be drinking", and you know he is going to draw, shoot to kill and you are not even wearing a gun. and you feel like this when you are seven and when you are forty-seven. I must admit I am not always able to stick to the idea my father does love me, he does approve of me and even is proud of me sometimes, but he is a human being with limitations and it is in this framework that I must understand him, tolerate him, not take him that seriously and then I can really love him. now he can curse me all he wants, he is aiming at a little kid who once was afraid but now has an understanding of what is going on and is not willing to recognize legitimacy to the faults and shortcomings everybodys parents have. now it is easier to help, to ignore their irritating comments that come from being in an irritable situation. find old movies, old stars in you tube archives (I used to do that with my mother) there is no formula or easy solution. but it is great if the love/approval thing gets resolved and her comments cannot hurt you anymore. good luck and God bless.

Are you afraid your going to have to take care of her once she leaves the nursing home? Does she understand what is going on with her health? I would talk to her Dr. and or a nurse or the head of the nursing home. Tell them what your fears are and if your Mom starts with any verbal abuse let her know that you will not allow her to be abusive to you and leave. She could possibly be abusive to others. You are no longer a child and you have your own family and home now. Do you have any other family members that could help with her recovery? Its very hard when a parent becomes the child and you become the parent.

I've actually had a lot of joy with telling my mother that if she shouts at me I will walk out right now... that it's outside my boundaries and I will defend those boundaries. Okay so she hasn't had a stroke, and I have been in her home (she doesn't go on the attack in public) But I do think you can say this to mum if she starts in on you. "Mother you will not speak to me this way, your behaviour is unacceptable and I will not tolerate it." and put her in a time out. Wheel her chair into another room and stick her in there facing the corner for one minute per year of her age....

lol. not that long. But five minutes certainly. Long enough for YOU to feel better. And she will learn alright. they do. when we're little they have no one to challenge them. Just remember: bullies are natural cowards. And if you dominate them they will stop trying to dominate you.

I'm not saying become as bad as her. Oh no. Ride the line. Tell her off, put her in time out, and then carry on when she's out like it never happened. Be vigilant. You're essentially parenting her. And it needs to be done.