I don't mean to brag but I wanted to share a little victory of mine, to show everyone here that there's hope. Here it is:
I met a guy on this site over the summer and it's time I finally make a post about it.
Since he first messaged me, we haven't gone a single day without talking at somepoint as far as I can recall, even if just briefly to check in and see how the other is doing. We text every day and also call or video chat whenever we can....he works overnight shifts which makes it difficult, but patience is key. We plan to meet someday and I can't wait.
What I love most about him is that he understands my anxiety and responds to me so well when it flares up. A lot of people in my life respond by getting angry, calling me crazy or saying I'm being completely unreasonable. They clearly don't understand what anxiety is like, but he does. For those of you who don't know, anxiety is: irritability, blowing up people's phones (not in the literal sense), trust issues, and more. He has experienced all of those from me and some way, some how still loves me and has stuck by me. It's almost hard for me to understand how he could.
Especially after I lost my ex and former best friend, this man has assured me that I was not the unlovable one in that situation; that my anxiety doesn't define me and that my empathetic and caring nature as well as everything else I have to offer more than makes up for it. No matter where life leads the two of us, I'll never stop loving him and caring about him.
He's not active on this site anymore, but if he by chance reads this: Thank you for being my personal handler, digital love and best friend. I will always love you
After chemo next week, I will have 6 weeks off. If i stay in remission, the oncologist said he will be ok with it if I decide not to do maintenance chemo. But I will continue to have to have blood work and be closely monitored. This rare cancer does have a higher recurrance rate. But I know two woman with it...one has been in remission 3 years, and the other 12. So I will take this happy news....
Hi, I interact with people on a daily basis, at work and French class. I make an effort to get to know people but it feels like I'm always the one putting in the effort and even when I do end up talking with new people it's always at the level of exchanging pleasantries. We could even have interesting conversations (this happens a lot at work) about feminism, politics, religion, philosophy...