So I'm meeting with a psychiatrist this week because a couple weeks ago I was thinking I wanted to try going the route of medication to help me deal with my anxiety while I try and figure things out. Im getting really stressed about having this appointment though. I'm just nervous about making this decision. I want to make the right choice about all of this, but I'm confused about what the right choice really is. I guess I should wait until I actually meet with him, but it's hard to not think about it. My mind is kind of going back to telling myself not to go through with it, probably because I'm so nervous and unsure right now. I think it's just easier for me to say no than it is to say yes. Right now I'm just not sure how I feel about all of this again because I feel like I have been doing really well recently, well at least compared to a couple weeks ago, and when this happens it just makes me feel like the anxiety is gone, even though I know that's not really the case.

And for those of you who read and responded to my last post, I still haven't told my mom about this. I wish it wasn't so hard for me to do that, but I just can't get myself to get it out to her.