Not everyone enjoys bar and club scenes. I would suggest finding people who are more your speed and understand anxiety. If you're young, I would recommend older friends.
For me, I surrounded myself with people who were passive, calm, and understanding people. It was hard to find, but people like that exist. Instead of going out clubbing I go out to lunch and have a nice chat one on one with people. It helps a lot.

I don't care for the bar scenes either. I would go when I use to love to dance but for no other reason. I think because I use to have to go and drag my mother out of the bars when I was 16. Obviously you are not with the right type of people because you don't have the same things in common which is going to make you start seeing all of them in a negative light. The first thing I think you need to do is find friends that are more like you and enjoy what you enjoy. There are many ways to meet people other than in a bar. You will get lots of advice from people here that can help with that. My suggestions would be to volunteer somewhere that you would enjoy doing the work and being around people that enjoy the same thing. It sounds like you are someone that wants a calm life, doing things other then partying and that is okay! I would like to ask one question of you if I can. Why do you think people don't like you and why wouldn't they? Can it just be that you don't have the same values and things in common.? I have made so many wonderful, loving, and caring friends here and that might be a good place to start. You might learn a lot about yourself that way too. Hugs GB

It is a pretty engrained thing in me , I always feel inadequate. I do enjoy things that not many other people enjoy. I feel like some of my values are antiquated and that I tend to herbalist and I bore myself. So I don't see the value in myself.

I love antiquated people! That is right up my alley! Can I ask why you feel inadequate? What has someone done or said to you that has caused you to feel this way.? There is always a reason for having these feelings, we don't just decide to have them. Why don't you let us decide if you are a bore? I have a feeling that you are not boring at all. I could say that about myself to be honest. I would like to know more about you other than your profile or the few words you spoke here. We are here to support you and understand what you are going through, I hope you believe that. Hugs GB

I'm antiquated in how behave socially. I 'lve saved myself for marriage . I don't find the idea of getting drunk or plastered fun. I prefer museums and theaters to clubs.As for why I am the way I am, I grew up being bullied in school and not really having anyone at home, or anywhere else, build up my self-esteem. My mother used to say you look ugly because your hair isn't brushed, but she didn't know the kids at school were already just calling me plain ugly. My mother used to nitpick how I walked, talked, and tried to avoid people. She made me feel very self conscious, and I internalized it and start putting myself down. Which made me an easy target. I've gotten better, but I still expect people o grow tied of me. I was always the third wheel friend or stepping stone friend, and I had an unhealthy habit of damaging the friendships that could have been good for me. My parents were also critical of some of my friends and that only really lead to me isolating myself further.

I commend you for saving yourself for marriage, I think that is something very special and I understand it. No, going out and getting plastered doesn't sound very exciting. I would rather go on a hike up to a water fall, Go on a long bike ride to the Zoo and learn about the animals. There is nothing wrong with you at all. Hugs GB

You've already received some excellent replies here! I can't add much to them. I myself never went to bars or clubs. You won't find "deep", quality people there! Saving oneself for marriage is something that only people who believe that their body is the temple of the Holy Spirit would understand and endorse. Men in bars, generally speaking, want to find someone for a one-night stand. How awful is that?

Go to bookstores, museums, poetry readings, and other places where the energies are wholesome and dignified. Project a friendly demeanor, smile, don't be afraid to talk to someone who appears conservative and respectful.

Thank you guys. I should really learn to let this go, but even as an adult it's hard to let go of some of those negative thoughts. Thank you guys. I'm going to try to look for a poetry place near me. I just have to learn how to foster a healthy friendship and not end it before we start it.