I was on paxil for 10 years and found it very helpful. It eliminated my anxiety so I was able to function. I preferred this over rescue meds like Xanax because I didn't want the highs and lows of anxiety. At first I was more tired than usual but I did get used to it after about a month. It did help me sleep at night though. I really miss that.

Where you seem to have your anxiety under control most of the time its possible you wont need a high dose of any med that you try. And if you find you don't like how tired you are on the med you always have the choice to go off it.

Take care

I actually have friends who take the same drug I am on (Klonopin/clonazepam) at way higher doses without feeling groggy, tired, or withdrawn. I am sensitive to drugs in general. I am tired in the morning but it is a physical not mental. I think it is just a matter of finding the right drug that is right for you. It can take 2-4 weeks to see how any med is going to affect you. Good luck.
*I had the lose of appetite too when my anxiety is up. I find making smoothies out of protein powder, greens powder, one cup of fruit (any variety, I like berries), a banana, 1/2 c almond milk, 1/2 c filtered water. I drank my meals for a few days at one point. It made me feel better to have nutrients in me without having to actually eat.

Congrats on recognizing your anxiety. Many people never have the courage to do this. You need to consult a psychiatrist if you haven't already. Millions of people are on meds; you are not alone.

The meds I am on do not make me tired or emotionally "out of it." I still get happy, sad, angry, etc. but that extra edge of anxiety is under control. I find I am able o get more done than before I was on them.

Honesty with your dr. is very important. If something isn't working, or if it is causing side effects, do speak up. Some people are afraid of authority figures like drs. but they want to know what's working and what isn't.

I wish you the very best in getting the help you deserve.