Hi, I'm a 22 year college student and I often feel like I cannot sit still. It has gotten worse and worse as the years have gone on. I would say that this has started when I was about 17 or so. I remember then coming home from school to and empty house not because I come from a broken home or anything I in fact have the best family in the world and I would never ask for anything more but being the youngest the rest of the family including siblings were either moved out or in college when this started. If I had to guess I would say that I about once a month I would just go to my room or where ever there was an empty room and completely lose control and breakdown. This has continued throughout the rest of high school and now college. About 2 years ago I would say that my breakdowns were about 10 to 2 weeks apart and now I am glad if I have 3 days without crying until I either fall asleep or am all dried up. I use to think that I was just depressed but in the last year or so I also have experienced anxiety. Most nights I lay in bed and have racing thoughts and can't sleep, or in class I can't concentrate on anything because all I can think about is what a huge mistake is was to major in what I am, I am a year an a half away from graduating with a degree that I lose interest in everyday. But the one thing that occupies all of my thoughts and concentration is the fact that I am alone all the time. I am sitting alone in my house right now on a beautiful although cold day right now writing this. I have never had a girlfriend or any kind of relationship other than a friendship. My friends mean the world to me but I look at them and they are doing so much more with there lives than I am and not to mention they are or have been in relationships and I simply don't think that I will ever find what I'm looking for. Everyone tells me that I'm to young to worry about this but if you're in this support group reading this than you know that when people say "don't worry about it" it does nothing for you. All my entries turn into these long novels I suppose this should be in my journal but I just would really really want to know if there are people out there like me? If so just let me know, even though we are complete strangers it means the world to me to read the posts from people see that I am not alone in the world, only alone in my house.
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