Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Things have been going so well, so I'm trying to remain as positive as I can. I'm kind of stressed right now though. I'm graduating in less than two weeks and although I still have another year at the school I'm at now to finished up a masters program, I'm starting to look into the next stage of my life which will be grad school for counseling. All of that sounds really exciting, but at the same time I'm stressed and scared for many reasons.
Lately I have been feeling like I'm kind of losing my friends from home. We just don't get to talk much and I don't always get responses back from them if I send a text or message. I know friendships change as life goes on and being away at different schools in different states doesn't help. It just upsets me that we aren't as close as we used to be and I'm scared of losing them. I spent more than half an hour today crying to one of my friends who I do talk to frequently about this. Being open about my feelings with one of my friends helped. It was good to be able to talk to her and I'm actually kind of impressed with myself that I was able to do that because this is the kind of thing that I would usually hold in as long as I could.
Thinking about all this made me realize that I think some of the emotions may be coming from fear of the future. The fact that I'm going to be going away to a new school where I don't know anyone in another year is a scary thought. It stresses me out to think that I'm going to be leaving the friends who I have made at school and then it adds to the stress about how I feel with my other friends. I know that in reality my friends will always be there but once I start to feel stressed and anxious it's kind of hard to think logically about this. I guess I'm just kind of worried about going from something familiar and comfortable to something completely new. Having separation anxiety probably doesn't help with all of this. I had a really rough time when I initially went away to school three years ago and I'm scared of going through the same thing again because it was hard to get through. I'm trying to just focus on now and on the fun and great memories I will have with my friends next year, but sometimes it's hard to not think about where I'm going next.
I wish I could just look to the future with excitement and positivity but that element of fear, stress, and uncertainty keeps finishing its way into mind.
Lately I have been feeling like I'm kind of losing my friends from home. We just don't get to talk much and I don't always get responses back from them if I send a text or message. I know friendships change as life goes on and being away at different schools in different states doesn't help. It just upsets me that we aren't as close as we used to be and I'm scared of losing them. I spent more than half an hour today crying to one of my friends who I do talk to frequently about this. Being open about my feelings with one of my friends helped. It was good to be able to talk to her and I'm actually kind of impressed with myself that I was able to do that because this is the kind of thing that I would usually hold in as long as I could.
Thinking about all this made me realize that I think some of the emotions may be coming from fear of the future. The fact that I'm going to be going away to a new school where I don't know anyone in another year is a scary thought. It stresses me out to think that I'm going to be leaving the friends who I have made at school and then it adds to the stress about how I feel with my other friends. I know that in reality my friends will always be there but once I start to feel stressed and anxious it's kind of hard to think logically about this. I guess I'm just kind of worried about going from something familiar and comfortable to something completely new. Having separation anxiety probably doesn't help with all of this. I had a really rough time when I initially went away to school three years ago and I'm scared of going through the same thing again because it was hard to get through. I'm trying to just focus on now and on the fun and great memories I will have with my friends next year, but sometimes it's hard to not think about where I'm going next.
I wish I could just look to the future with excitement and positivity but that element of fear, stress, and uncertainty keeps finishing its way into mind.
These are very normal reasons to experience anxiety. Anytime we do something new there will always be that little questioning voice inside our head. Here's the thing though....you have already done this before...so you KNOW...for a FACT....that you CAN do it...right? It's OK to be a bit scared. Look at this new experience as excitement. The same chemicals are released with fear as with excitement. So work on convincing yourself that it is exciting to do these new things.
As for your friends. I am 51 years old. I have childhood friends that I have had since I was 11. They live all over the country but no one lives near me. We all got together for our 50th birthdays for a weekend in SanFransico. Believe me it was like we were 11 again. I have never have to say goodbye to these people because they are always in my heart. You are not leaving your friends you are just going to where your life is taking you for the moment. Those friends will always be there with an email, skype, face to face...what ever method of communication you use. When my mom passed away last summer all of these childhood chums got I touch with me...some even showed up at the funeral from miles and miles away.
Every time you have a negative scary thought about this....take some slow deep breaths....then work on changing the negative thought that is giving you these negative feelings. Don't forget...positive thoughts bring on positive experiences. Only you have the power to bring on the positive within yourself. Bring it on!!!
And about going to grad school, I am so excited! I can't wait to be achieving goals and dreams and to be doing what I want with my life. Sometimes when I think about it though I just get kind of scared. But when that happens I'm going to try and turn the fear into excitement and positive thoughts like you said.
I know that my friends will always be there, that I'm going to be doing so many great things in my life very soon, that I'll be reaching my goals, and that I can do it all. I know that there are going to be challenges along the way but I have the ability to overcome them. I'm going to do my best to stay positive and when I'm having trouble with that I'm realizing well I have my friends there to help me through those moments of fear and stress.
Thanks for the encouragement! It's much easier to think about all of this from a positive perspective when the moment of stress has passed and it always helps me to hear the advice and encouragement from someone else.
I understand what you are feeling. I am currently working on my master's in counseling, but it is not my first masters and I am probably a great deal older. I have however struggled with anxiety my entire life, especially with separation anxiety and with abandonment. I can tell you that anxiety about losing friends is not comfortable or pleasant, but that that loss has been a reality of life for me and I have had to learn to deal with that over time. I know that probably doesn't make you feel better, but I hope that it helps you to feel that you are not alone. People come and go in our lives due to death, moving and various other reasons. If we are truly fortunate, we get to keep some in our lives for a long time. When I get anxious, I try to concentrate on the good times and what I have learned from others and try to look forward to making new friends. I hope this helps, my thoughts are with you. Jane