I personally feel like you get this stigma about you when you admit openly that you have anxiety or another mood disorder. People who have never had it, don't understand what you are saying or the extent of your problems so they choose to overlook them or be hush-hush about it as if you have some major psychotic disorder.

That has been my experience with confronting others face-to-face mostly. And since they try (or don't) to understand and can't wrap their heads around it, they make you feel like something is terribly wrong with you.

I was recently at brunch with a few friends and one of them happened to mention how her sister has anxiety and how much of a pain in the butt it is for her to deal with and how her sister should just hurry up and get some help already because she is pissing her off and annoying the hell out of her. Very insensitive and ignorant of what anxiety is, what it does to you and what it takes to get through it. And also very insensitive to the fact that there is a person at the table (ME) who has to deal with this everyday and would like to think that they have the encouragement and support of those around you. THIS person and their attitude, is one of the reasons why I tend to not bring attention to it in public to the best of my ability. They make me feel bad about myself and my condition.

What I am learning to acknowledge now is that some people are afraid of what they do not understand. And they act out on it. The anxiety not my fault, I didn't ask for it and I shouldn't be ashamed of what I have had no control over. What matters is that I am actively making efforts to be more in control of it now that I understand how it affects me. And I have come to realize that I really don't need people like that "friend" in my life if that is how they feel about others close to them and their misfortunes.

I've been more vocal amongst my friends this time out, but I don't talk to everyone.

This situation even when talking it out is lonely as hell. It is a relief to come her and find others who suffer with this disease. It helps know I am not alone.

I hate this anxiety thing and I really need to beat it.

Good Luck beating it!!!

I finally found a meetup group for people with anxiety disorders in my city. I went to my first meeting two weeks ago and i felt so RELIEVED hearing others speak about it and how it affects their day-to-day life. I could relate to everything they said.

I plan on going to more of their events because it feels nice to finally be around people who get it and who are trying things like this group to overcome it.

I don't have a problem telling people I have an anxiety disorder. I don't just go around telling everyone, but if it somehow comes up in conversation, I definitely don't hold back. I do think that a lot of other people hold back though. Maybe they are embarrassed by it or don't like to discuss it, I'm not sure. They might not even realize what they are feeling is part of an anxiety disorder. I have had anxiety symptoms since I was very young, and it really started to affect my life severely around 7th grade. But I didn't know that it was an anxiety disorder, rather than a medical disorder causing my problems until my senior year of high school.

I also think that people don't understand the extent anxiety, along with other mental disorders. I have a friend who is bipolar, and when she tells people, they tend to think she is crazy and can't control herself, even though it is well controlled on medication. I tend to have the opposite problem. I tell people about my anxiety and they think it is the same thing as feeling anxious every once in a while or that I just get nervous in certain situations. But I agree, it would be nice if more people were open about it. It is always helpful to have someone who understands what you are going through.

One of anxiety's best used weapons in its massive arsenal of weapons is isolation. Its real good at it. Affects how you relate to people and the world around you and can even put barriers up with the strongest of relationships.
When you are stressing about your anxiety really the last thing in the world you want to do is tell anyone about it because you know from the off that "look" will appear on their face that says thats why they are acting a bit crazy LOL.
This is because NO ONE who has not had this will get it, ever.
If you want to talk about it then stick with here or else do a search to see if there is something more local to you

I think with anxiety that you have to have a sense of humor about it. Anxiety is not a serious thing. It feels serious. It feels menacing. It feels horrible. But it isn't. We have anxiety because we freak out too easily. Bottom line.

I freak out WAY too easily. I know that. But its not my fault. Its who I am. We all are "characters" in a sense, and that is my character. I am a girl with a great big heart, who loves to laugh, and will freak out if the slightest thing goes wrong. Anybody who knows me knows that. And nobody has ever made me feel bad for it. Sometimes people lose patience in me, but every person on this planet has a personality trait people lose patience in. I am not going to hide who I am and pretend I am somebody I am not just because people might not "get it". If they don't "get it" right away, eventually, as they get to know me they will. And if I never see them again, then I don't give a crap anyway.

If YOU think your anxiety is a big deal, other people are going to think its a big deal. If you can laugh about it, other people will most likely get that its really not a big deal.

I even announce my anxiety in situations where I think I need to. When getting on elevators, I always tell the person next to me that I am terrified of elevators and if we get stuck, I will be freaking out. I don't say it like I am ashamed of it. I say it like "This is me. Just lettin' you know." And nobody has EVER looked at me like I'm crazy. They usually smile with me. It puts me at ease and makes the whole ride a lot more tolerable.

I don't usually get panicky anymore but if I do, I just tell the person next to me...."bear with me....I have some anxiety issues and I just need to calm myself down."

Having anxiety is hard enough without trying to pretend like you DON'T have anxiety. And let me tell you, you aren't alone. Anxiety is everywhere. I cannot tell you how many times I have talked to people and told them about my problem and they say "Yep, me too."

My 9 year old nephew has anxiety and I have worked really hard to help him understand that it is just part of his character and not something to hide from people. And I was so proud of the day we went to Barnes and Noble so we could pick out an anxiety book and as we walked up to the counter he told the cashier "I have anxiety" and she said "Hey, I do too!" And he got the biggest smile on his face. I love telling that story because here is this little kid who worries so much and knows he is different, but he is proud of that difference because he knows that you can only have this "problem" if you are smart, with a big imagination. It took me 10 years to make friends with my anxiety and he did it in a month. lol He's awesome.

Anyway, I know everybody is different and you may not feel you can share so much with other people, but at least consider and think about it and let the idea kind of sink in a little bit. Anxiety is who you are. It IS you. To deny it or hide from it is to say that you are ashamed of who you are. And to me, that is worse than having the anxiety disorder.

I have dealt with my anxiety like Lily. I don't tell the whole world, but my close friends know its a part of who I am. No big deal. I laugh about it too......if I am on the phone with my best friend & we are discussing a stressful situation, I will say, oh wow I might have to take my pill for that! It takes the "scariness" of anxiety away since my close friends & husband know.

I don't think most people realize how debilitating anxiety can be. I was at work yesterday and someone came up to me and basically told me that when I look and act anxious/depressed, it is contagious and other people get bummed out. I know it's true, and yet, how can I be responsible for the whole world when I cannot even control my own emotions? That comment actually did shake me up a bit, and I felt better for a while, until the anxiety creeped back under my skin.

I'm glad that you feel solace in DS and share your feelings with others who know exactly how you feel. I just joined the group and have a great feeling I will be comfortable here. Thanks!

there's a groupd here for anxiety. some good ideas too!

I felt pretty isolated until I started casually mentioning it around people I knew well. They took it in stride and were usually a little relieved - almost everyone has or knows someone who suffers from anxiety. It's more normal than we think!

I think there is a lot to be said about mentioning it casually, matter-of-factly. It's hard for people to know how to respond initially. As they get used to the idea that we have anxiety they can deal with some of the more extreme episodes, but I don't dump that on them initially.

Starke - I think your coworker's comment was inappropriate. YOU are NOT responsible for how anyone else acts or feels. You are responsible ONLY for you. If your coworker has another suggestion such as, "Hey, it'd kind of hard on office morale when you are stressed - would you mind taking a quick walk to calm down?" Or something along those lines. They cannot ask you to "be" differently. That's not fair. They can ask for different specific behaviors or ask for your help in figuring out collective ways to make things better.

But it's not your fault. My guess is something else in the office is stressing people out and they're looking for someone to blame. You (or anyone else) can't "make" anyone do or feel anything they don't want to do or feel.

I feel more comfortable with my friends and coworkers that I am around most knowing but I make sure to explain it thouroughly. No they wont know what it feels like but they will know how to help me and what to say. The last thing I want them to do is call ems when I start hyperventilating or tell me to 'calm down.' I feel more safe and secure with them knowing.

The comment (I think Lily) made about making friends with anxiety is so good. When we think of illness in ones we want it tangible......well just hang out with me for a while and it will be tangible! It is real and people need to be aware of it.

I have lived with it for way too many years and do not want to hide it behind a closed door as if I am ashamed of it. It is part of me and acceptance helps me combat the feelings of fear and anxiety.

People do not hide Cancer, Diabetes, Heart Disease and etc. Then why hide a malfunction of the brain.

I am fortunate to have friends who we can laugh together about all we do to live life with anxiety. Many others would not know it unless I told them as I look no different than anyone else...... but when I lose it and start babbling they realize it is an anxiety attack and we can laugh or cry together and they have a picture into what it is like to live this way.

I just refuse not to let people know it is real and manageable but always waiting to grab on when I least expect it to.

There is definitely a stigma when someone has a "psychiatric" problem, at least with those people who DON'T have these issues. Depression, anxiety, bipolar, schizophrenia, etc., are all illnesses. No different than diabetes, heart disease, etc. They are diseases and need to be treated with doctors and medication. I have learned that over the last few months because anxiety has paralyzed me. The hardest thing for me to do was tell my daughter. It seems like once I did that, it became easier to share with people. I mean, you don't need to share every detail, but people have chemical imbalances, and they need to be treated. They affect our health. I think if someone can't understand it, then they really aren't a friend, and don't deserve you in their life anyway. I actually have been able to help 2-3 people understand their own anxiety and helped them get help. So ok, maybe Im' uncomfortable talking about it, but if what I am going through can help one person get well, or get help, I'll be embarrassed for a minute or so. But the people who don't get it, they have no clue. And maybe someday they will develop mind boggling anxiety or depression, or paralyzing panic, and then they will understand.

I am so glad I read all of these posts! It makes me realize that maybe it would be a good idea to share this with some of my close friends. I don't think it's good to start saying woe is me stuff but it would be nice to share it with them when I'm going through an extremely hard time. I just do my best to fake it and not to isolate when I'm going through a bout of this.Anxietymc, It would be nice to find a group locally here if there is one. I'm not very computer savy but I think I'll give it a shot and try to find one. I know ,I see all the green smileys on everybody's profiles and it's nice to see that people feel good enough to have them! I leave mine yellow no matter how I'm doing.It's just so hard to share this with anyone that can't grasp what you're facing.Sometimes it's all I can do to make it through a day of work and fake it around my girlfriend. I've told her some about it but she really doesn't understand why I just can't get over it. It's a hard thing to talk about with your friends because I feel like I might loose them if I tell them what I go through.I'm doing my best at practicing the acceptance of this stuff and not reacting to it! I'm really glad to read all of these responses on here! A little insight in how everybody shares this stuff is good to hear! Thx for posting this,O,Garrett

Thanks for all the replies...interesting stuff.....and don't get me wrong...I'm not suggesting we start spilling our guts to everybody that crosses our path. I'm very private and say very little to very few. I just wish I wasn't embarrassed about it and that it didn't have such a stigma.