Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Ok, so the situation is:
Picking up snacks in a crowded grocery store with a friend before movie night at home. Crowded and not a quick in-and-out (he's changing his mind about what he wants and taking forever.. Just dragging me around the store through his indecision and it's a madhouse). I comment that I'm having trouble breathing and it's too crowded there (not direct enough I now realize to clue him in) and he just keeps wandering around. By the time we get back im exhausted and still feel unwell all night despite not having a full-on panic attack.
So how do we do this? Navigate uncertain and unstructured social activities like this one that seem so simple? I feel in moments like that like I don't want to rush the person, don't want to be selfish or act needy/meladramatic by making a really direct statement of need or just leaving myself. I just want to tough it out and heck, maybe it'll just take another minute, it's just one of those things.
I also don't want to get snappy or resent friends for doing normal things or just being a little oblivious to my state when they want to spend extra time out or maybe just when plans are not planned. People don't like planning I guess, and im just not as flexible as others due to my attacks and general anxiety. When I try to be flexible like this I suffer--and then the friendship suffers because I get mad or avoid.
This has come up before with me (panic attack in a mall while my friend leasurely shopped and hit another store with me in food court doing deep breathing lol) and it affects friendships. And as you guys probably know.. It's very hard to think clearly and not be edgy/reactive in as bad state. I need to improve how I work through this stuff when people I care about are involved, while still taking care of myself. Would love any feedback and similar experiences/advice.
Picking up snacks in a crowded grocery store with a friend before movie night at home. Crowded and not a quick in-and-out (he's changing his mind about what he wants and taking forever.. Just dragging me around the store through his indecision and it's a madhouse). I comment that I'm having trouble breathing and it's too crowded there (not direct enough I now realize to clue him in) and he just keeps wandering around. By the time we get back im exhausted and still feel unwell all night despite not having a full-on panic attack.
So how do we do this? Navigate uncertain and unstructured social activities like this one that seem so simple? I feel in moments like that like I don't want to rush the person, don't want to be selfish or act needy/meladramatic by making a really direct statement of need or just leaving myself. I just want to tough it out and heck, maybe it'll just take another minute, it's just one of those things.
I also don't want to get snappy or resent friends for doing normal things or just being a little oblivious to my state when they want to spend extra time out or maybe just when plans are not planned. People don't like planning I guess, and im just not as flexible as others due to my attacks and general anxiety. When I try to be flexible like this I suffer--and then the friendship suffers because I get mad or avoid.
This has come up before with me (panic attack in a mall while my friend leasurely shopped and hit another store with me in food court doing deep breathing lol) and it affects friendships. And as you guys probably know.. It's very hard to think clearly and not be edgy/reactive in as bad state. I need to improve how I work through this stuff when people I care about are involved, while still taking care of myself. Would love any feedback and similar experiences/advice.
I don't really have much advice on how to overcome anxiety in crowds or in public. I wish I did, because I deal with the same problem pretty often. Sometimes, I just try to suck it up and sometimes I just can't. It doesn't help any when you have friends who don't understand the first thing about anxiety. My best friend doesn't understand it at all and she thinks it's so easy to overcome, which makes me angry. We aren't nearly as close as we used to be because I am getting tired of her judging me all the time, so I can understand what you mean about anxiety putting a strain on your relationships/friendships.
Like I said, I wish I had better advice for you, but I thought it would help to at least know that you're not alone. Take care.
That said, there will always be social situations that will be stressful. You can be honest with your friends about your disorder and ask for their support and understanding. Just explain that you need to go outside and take a few deep breaths.
I hope that helps!