So I'm really new to this, I've found out about site through a crisis counselor... I just want to vent and see if there's anyway to help any of it.. Sorry if this is the wrong group or sorry if this gets to be too long... Most of its about my boyfriend... Anyways I'm a freshman in high school, tomorrow is my first homecoming, and that was basically the one think I was so happy to be going to, I dont like dresses but I did get a dress, my boyfriend asked me and he told me the next day he couldn't go.. We've been together for a little over 9 months and I feel like we are losing the connection and get more distant by the day. The past maybe one and a half weeks its consisted of my feeling way lower then I have been in a while, I've given up, most of my grades are horrible, I don't really care about a lot anymore, and all my mind has really thought about lately was suicide.. I've good myself over and over that's all I want, a month ago into myself I had him as a reason.. But I felt like I've given up everything and nothing matters toe anymore, I want to die, I don't want to live anymore... But I'm scared if I do try, and fail what will people think of me.... Im scared I'm going to harm myself one day and regret it... Idk what I want anymore... I have no goals, my mom wants to put me back into counseling... But I don't wanna go... I'm ready read to give up... My parents act like they don't even care... My mom will ask me say after day what's wrong with you or say well maybe you just need to go back to counseling, I don't think that they even want me anymore...