Anger Management Support Group
Anger management commonly refers to therapeutic techniques by which someone with excessive or uncontrollable anger can control or reduce their emotions. Typical examples include the use of deep breathing and meditation as a means to relaxation. Psychologists recommend a balanced approach, which both controls the emotion and allows it to express itself in a healthy way.
I'm currently 23 (male) and when I was growing up, I've destroyed many doors, hit holes through walls and tons of other things. I've never once hit anyone or gotten in a physical fight with anyone.
The thing people have to understand, is that when someone has anger issues like that there's a pretty severe problem underlying it all, and the person needs help as fast as possible. I can't tell you what the problem is exactly, though. All I know is that when I was a teenager, I had severe mental health problems (aside from anger) and I was angry at the world. I was angry at my family, at people in general and at my self. It's a long story.
When I hit or throw something, it's extremely embarrassing and I've regretted it every time. I never WANTED to damage my parent's house, it sucks a lot. Even though I'm A LOT better then I used to be, last week I got angry out of no where (because of my thoughts) in a bathroom and threw a bottle of shampoo against a wall, which put a small hole.
I'd get in an argument with my mom or sister growing up a lot, because they've always been good at triggering built up rage in me so I'd end up screaming and swearing as loud as I can, saying I want everyone to die and I don't care about anything or anyone.. I'd also start pacing around like a maniac. Some times I'd end up hitting something full force destroying what ever it is.
It's terrifying when it happens, but after that it's the most relaxing feeling. All this bad, pent up energy just gets released and that's when I ''come back down to earth''. Usually after that happens I'd feel very depressed and think about committing suicide, because I'm tired of feeling the way I do every day.
Like I said, I've always regretted it after, simply because I don't like damaging my parent's property, but I don't regret getting angry. I have my reasons, although for years now I've worked A LOT on it and I'm trying to discover how to let go, if that makes sense.
Nowadays like I said, it's rare for me to hit or throw something. But my behavior, thoughts and general outlook on people is extremely negative. I feel like I don't give a shit about 99% of people and have no empathy. The reason why I'm saying this is because it doesn't seem normal. Even though I don't hit or destroy anything like I used to, I've become very emotionally cold.
I find myself giving people the finger, swearing, making fun of and stuff like that a lot when they piss me off (driving, for example). I'm afraid it's going to get out of control one day.
If anyone has any advice or links that would be helpful, please don't hesitate to share.. I've trying hard to improve.
The thing people have to understand, is that when someone has anger issues like that there's a pretty severe problem underlying it all, and the person needs help as fast as possible. I can't tell you what the problem is exactly, though. All I know is that when I was a teenager, I had severe mental health problems (aside from anger) and I was angry at the world. I was angry at my family, at people in general and at my self. It's a long story.
When I hit or throw something, it's extremely embarrassing and I've regretted it every time. I never WANTED to damage my parent's house, it sucks a lot. Even though I'm A LOT better then I used to be, last week I got angry out of no where (because of my thoughts) in a bathroom and threw a bottle of shampoo against a wall, which put a small hole.
I'd get in an argument with my mom or sister growing up a lot, because they've always been good at triggering built up rage in me so I'd end up screaming and swearing as loud as I can, saying I want everyone to die and I don't care about anything or anyone.. I'd also start pacing around like a maniac. Some times I'd end up hitting something full force destroying what ever it is.
It's terrifying when it happens, but after that it's the most relaxing feeling. All this bad, pent up energy just gets released and that's when I ''come back down to earth''. Usually after that happens I'd feel very depressed and think about committing suicide, because I'm tired of feeling the way I do every day.
Like I said, I've always regretted it after, simply because I don't like damaging my parent's property, but I don't regret getting angry. I have my reasons, although for years now I've worked A LOT on it and I'm trying to discover how to let go, if that makes sense.
Nowadays like I said, it's rare for me to hit or throw something. But my behavior, thoughts and general outlook on people is extremely negative. I feel like I don't give a shit about 99% of people and have no empathy. The reason why I'm saying this is because it doesn't seem normal. Even though I don't hit or destroy anything like I used to, I've become very emotionally cold.
I find myself giving people the finger, swearing, making fun of and stuff like that a lot when they piss me off (driving, for example). I'm afraid it's going to get out of control one day.
If anyone has any advice or links that would be helpful, please don't hesitate to share.. I've trying hard to improve.
- Very jumpy and sensitives to sounds. Loud ''bands'', ''crashes'' and send a jolt of anger through my body.
- Very socially paranoid. I feel like people are constantly going to attack me.
- Distrust for humans generally.
''bangs''* not ''bands''
sensitive* not sensitives
I moved to the city and there were no cows around and so I hit inanimate objects. I share your pain Spike. I still hit doors and what makes it bad is they are DOORS THAT I OWN. So I got to pay for my anger.
Now, I moved on to objects that won't crush and also remember that if I hit w/ 50, 80 lbs of force I'm too old for that shit and will probably break my hand. So I don't........It's better to swear than to hit. It's better to go to the bathroom take a ______ and breathe deeply and relax rather than to swear. My daughter doesn't swear. I figure if a 13 yr. old isn't swearing that I'm the stupid damn 52 yr old that does. So, I've swear less.
You were smart for knowing that there's an underlying problem. My problem is not making money to pay all my bills. So I have a constant rage at people, circumstances where I feel fucked over, ripped off.
This is a wild idea,but it helped me. It doesn't work for everyone. & if you get angry in your car or job you can't stop and use it then. But doing this AT HOME really has made me swear less, and get a certain PEACE.
Go to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlfQIRJEsYk
do 6 steps,
1. go to full screen mode.
2. Think about the thing that made you mad and relive the anger
3. Give the anger a rating between 1 and 10. 1 is your chilling and normal 10 = your going to kill someone pretty damn SOON.
4. Watch that video for 3 minutes, look at the boxes going back and forth, but also read the suggestions. You will find that the video aims specifically to relax your brain, but not quickly but taking minutes & minutes
4. Rate your anger again after 3 minutes of it. If your above a 5 do another 3 minutes,
5. Repeat steps 2, 3, 4 over until you are a 3 or less.
& Spike if you or anyone else are not helped by that, I'm sorry.
I had my oldest, my 19 yr old son try it b/c he gets angry. He looked at it and said that he went from a 9 all the way down to a "1" after 6 minutes.
I said, "Damn, Andy, you lost your anger quick! I guess your a better man than I !" We both had a good laugh.
Can't promise anyone it will work that fast !
& you do it on a regular or even semi-regular basis. It helps.
lightwarrior & square make some very good points.
I would add learn the underlying aspect of your anger. If I make enough money, I'm not angry. I was happy in June b/c my 2nd income, eBay selling, kicked into high gear. Also, anger is similar to hate, b/c both emotions only serve to hurt you. They are a wake-up call to solve a problem. As you can see in another post I need to get a job.