I have grown up in a family full of "sore losers". It was just natural for me to be the same way. What started changing me was when I would watch their reaction after losing and realise how childish they look. If you can actually sit back and see yourself reacting this say I think you would realise what a waste of time it was. Not only does it make you feel bad but it upsets and effects those around you. And all for what? A game... Sure it's nice to win but there's got to be a loser. I also hate that word "loser". Our society has really turned it into such an ugly and unacceptable thing. All I did was decide to leave the "temper tantrums" to my 2 year old.

Thank you very much Achakra, I appreciate what you had to say on this topic and agree that as a society we place too much emphasis on winning.There are times when I have been all right with not winning and when that has happened my thoughts have been "I'll come back better the next time" and also try to realize that in not winning I can learn from it.Here is a question for you and others? Do you think as a whole men are more competitive then women or are women more competitive then men?I think personally men are more outwardly competitive then women but women are also competitive but not as much in games and sports.Thanks again and best to you.

Sometimes I get upset if I lose especially if I play really poorly. I get angry at myself if I don't perform as well as I know I can. But it used to be worse when I was younger. I think it's related to my self esteem. I feel better about myself if I do well and others say good job. The opposite is true. I feel inferior if do poorly. That's why I don't like group sports with strangers because I'm afraid of embarassing myself. That's why I'm so hard or angry at myself. It's ironic because I don't usually embarass myself but the fear is still there. I get angry if my team doesn't win. I think that's normal. It's an escape from everyday stress to route for your team. When they win I'm on top of the world. When they lose, it sucks but it doesn't bother me too long. Men generally are more competitive. Women are usually peacemakers. They try not to hurt others feelings.

In this society I think women have become more competitive than they used to; not necessarily about sports but in business, I think and sometimes with each other over a guy. I am competitive when I sense someone trying to outdo me on the job...but the work I do now is solitary so there is less of that edge now.

I use be a real jeckyll and hyde and sometimes it comes out once in a blue moon. But I seem to have calm down tremendously. I think women have become more competitive in the corporate world and also some sports. But I believe men will have that natural instinct to try to win.

I also get angry when I feel like I am "losing" in a job related situation. I then feel very bad about myself because I got angry.

I don't have a problem with winning or losing anymore. I trained myself that it is ok and it's great to win but if I don't win then it just gives me a motive to work and try harder. I know that sounds lame but growing up with a mother who is very competitive and still is and a sister the same way has taught me a great deal. My mom get furious if she "loses" anything and my sister doesn't get angry but she is one that believes that you do what you can do win, no matter what! I think it is ridiculous how we put so much emphasizes on winning or losing instead of just enjoying ourselves. Think of it this way "Winning is just icing on the cake". Have fun. It took me years to retrain myself but I am glad I did.

Also, I know quite a few women who very competitive in sports and in the business field. Don't shoot me but I think the reason women aren't more competitive in sports is because we tend to be more opt to mold into "society" better. That probably wasn't the best way to explain myself.