Amputees Support Group

Amputation is the removal of a body extremity by trauma or surgery. Many have undergone amputation or have been living with a missing limb since birth. In either case, life as an amputee can be challenging. This is the place to find others going through the same experiences as an amputee. Share your thoughts, troubles, and solutions with the community.

292 Members
1,330 Posts
0 Online
Muscles & Bones
/ Amputees Support Group

caregiver of a 75 year old amputee

Yaris
Yaris

Having  a difficult time keeping my spirits up and his.  He had his leg amputated 2 years ago and still has a very hard time with it.  He has a prostetic but choses not to use it.  He seems to be happy in his recliner watching TV.  Drives me crazy.  I want to help help him lead as normal of a life as he can.  He plays the victim when I try to encourage him to do things.  I think he might be in a depression and giving up.

eleanormal
eleanormal
I'm not sure if the guy you are caring for is a family member or if this is a paid caregiving job that you are struggling with. Sounds as if he doesn't have a reason to get up and out of his recliner. From what I've learned about amputees, he does not need to put on his leg to move around so his lack of interest in wearing the prosthetic leg is not concerning. However, his lack of interest in being social is worrisome. Does he have family members who might motivate him to get outside of the house? Would he be interested in meeting other amputees? There are options other than the tv but you might need to change the way you feel about him too. If you feel like he's "playing the victim" and you're going "crazy"--it might be time to think about switching jobs. Both of you probably need a change.
Yaris
Yaris
He is not a family member. He and I started dating 10 years ago and he got infection in his leg ending with the amputation.
In the last few days he has become more interested in going into the garage and puttering around outside. So maybe some of the weather changes have affected him as well as the rest of us.
As far as switching jobs, that probably isn't an option. He has not family in the state.
Davidlenn
Davidlenn
Hi I'm David LBKA 1-16. It does sound like he is depressed. There is Cognative Behavior Therapy along with meds that can be beneficial, BUT you cannot force either on him. Some people are happy with not having to use their prosthethic.
The ONLY thing you can control in all of this is YOU. You may need to seek out a therapist and/or your physician for meds for you.
Stephdon
Stephdon
I had a BKA 2 years ago and I have battled a lot of depression since then. I am glad not to be in pain, but it is a shocking to me when I see myself in the mirror. I worked with an online program out of Johns Hopkins and I see a psychologist every couple of weeks. I have been working full time through all of this but I have a hard time knowing that I am "other" now at my job and in the public. I highly recommend the Johns Hopkins program as a starting point.