I'm not the best at talking about my problems, and I really hate that I'm coming to a message board where nobody knows me, but, right now, I honestly don't know where else to go. I'm going to try to keep this as short as possible, so bear with me. Three months ago, I celebrated my eighteenth birthday. Two weeks later, I fell into a deep depression that eventually lead to me overdosing heavily on Tylenol. When I woke up, I was in the hospital with I.V.s in my arms and it was three days after I had overdosed. The next couple of days were a blur to me, and I don't really recall what happened. The first thing I remember is waking up in a mental hospital. I barely remembered what had happened and was scared. I asked the nurses what happened and where I was. They told me about the overdose, which caused me to go into seizures that were so severe, they had to place me under a coma just so the convulsions would stop. They said that there was a good chance that my liver, kidneys, and brain would never be the same due to the severity of the overdose. Three weeks later, I was released and went to stay with my dad. We moved to Pensacola, Florida shortly thereafter. I stayed with him until one fateful night when he violently attacked me and threatened me with a knife. I was unable to stay with him, so I moved in with my grandparents. It's been two weeks since I moved in with them, and I've started to realize that I literally can't remember almost anything from before the hospital. I can remember people. I can remember their names, who they are to me, and who I am to them. But I can't remember how I met them. I can't remember the times we've seen each other. I can't remember birthdays, holidays, or anything in between. It's like I'm on the outside of my own life looking at shadows of the people I used to know. I tried talking to my best friend about it and he said that it sounded amazing, not being able to remember all the pain that I've gone through in life. But what about the good memories? My ex-girlfriend and I were talking about giving things another shot and she started talking about memories that we had: our first kiss, the walks along the beach we used to love, the first time we met. And I didn't remember any of it. I could tell she was upset by it, but I almost didn't believe it. How could I have forgotten some of the most memorable moments of my life? It broke my heart... I guess the whole reason I'm posting this can be summarized in one question: does it ever get better, or at least easier to deal with? Thank you for hearing me out.
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