Your guilt is understandable...but it is a must for you to get some relief and down time for yourself.....try to let it go,and know you are doing the right thing.
Hey,maybe he'll even like it ?

I am hoping he does, lots of people tell me they do so..........

I've been told by EVERYBODY that Mother should go. It's good for her and better for me. If you're doing it Monday, I will too.

I tried to talk Neal into going to the day care in Homer back when Winter still worked at the senior center but he flatly refused, even though it ment he would be able to see her off and on but he still just said NO so I have not pushed him since then.

My mom has to go to daycare because I work. The benefit for me is that I don't have to be the only one keeping track of her changes any more. If I have questions, they can answer. We are giving our family members a tremendous gift by caring for them through this disease. We are all caregivers at heart, or we wouldn't be doing this. But we also have to take care of ourselves if we want to stay in it for the long haul. I enjoy my days at work. My mom comes home from daycare very tired and always sleeps well that night.

Why would you ever feel guilty? I am so grateful for the time Ken spends at Senior Citizens. Ken loves it. They make him feel special. It gives him socialization and stimulation. You really need some time to yourself. You will be a better caregiver if you have some time to yourself to rejuvenate. You are absolutely right when you say you need to do something. Go for it!

Mother has a fit every time I mention it. Much like Neal, she refuses to go. Her neurologist told me to lie to her, put her in the car, drop her off and leave. OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't even want to think about what will happen when I pick her up. She doesn't like people. Never has. She's always left the socialization to my Dad, now me. I really do think I'll hire someone for one day a week. It's the same cost and won't get her so upset.

I don't plan on telling him in advance. I have learned the hard way it is better not to tell him too much in advance- better just a little at a time so he can't work himself up. I am going to say we are gong for a ride, which he loves and then bring him there, stay a few minutes and then just go. At least that's my plan.....

Deb, you will feel guilty the first two, maybe three times, but it soon wears off and you look forward to having a few hours to yourself to do something for YOU. Please be sure to do something for just YOU, a manicure, pedicure, hair cut, something.

You will be relieved to get him inside and close the door behind you and go off to breakfast, shopping, or visiting friends.

Jim hated to go and fought me all the way but once he got there, he really enjoyed his day and that helped me to not feel guilty because I knew he was getting care, being sociable and eating well.

Hang in there and enjoy this time.

Hugs