Deb , u will get thru this, u r and awesome person.....
hugs
juanita

You can do this. What you have been through already with Rollie is testimony to that.
I think what you are feeling and doing is very natural. I find myself doing the same thing. My biggest problem right now is that I can't sit still, I always feel like I need to be somewhere else. I still have some company here too, so who knows what lurks around the corner for me.
I am so glad you went for this respite, you will come back refreshed and ready to do what you have to do. Now you know you can do it again if you need too later. Just remember you earned it and very much deserve it. Enjoy...he will be fine.
xo Carolyn

After Ron died.. I missed his "presence", too. And I still turn my head to glance at the couch (where he lived) occasionally.

The day after Ron went to respite.. I bawled almost an entire day. AND I am not a crier ! I think it was a combination of relief, fear and the realization of how hard it had been, and guilt for not wanting to do it any longer.

We are just a mess of mixed and conflicting emotions.. before, during and after.

Hugs !
Judy

Is respite like a place for the client to go for a certain amount of time to be monitored and to give the caretaker a break? I think I read the VA does this. My dad is sick,

the VA has a lot to offer so please check them out. Yes, I am allowed 4 weeks a year where I can bring him and they will watch him day and night while I go home and rest.

I think what you are expressing sounds perfectly normal, I feel it when I drop Rob off for 5 hrs of day care once a week!!

One day when I left I cried all the way home , realizing just where this disease has taken us. Further realizing that he is so far gone that he is willing to go to daycare. I worry about him the whole time.

Yes there are times I get fed up and don't think I can do this anymore, but then when I think what it will be like when he really leaves me I get sick to my stomach. Some of us know that may be not too far off and I think it is making the whole reality crash down on us a bit.

I pray for ALL of us........Hugs Sherri

I feel this way SOOOO much......I KNOW what you are talking about.....

I had dinner with a friend yesterday. She is a widow except that her healthy husband was murdered. She had no time to prepare as we do but even though the situation was different she was still able to connect with me and it was wonderful. She told me that the first week or month she felt absolutely NUMB, like she had no feelings in her fingers, no taste in her food, just numb every where. I guess that is how I need to really to start think and prepare for.

My counselor said that now is definitely the time to plan and prepare for the future that will come.