Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
" In the 20 plus years I've been in this recovery thing I've got to say this is probably the most important part of living a life (a second chance at life in fact!) in recovery which is REALLY WORTH living.
I must work with others in recovery. Others who are remaining teachable & out of the black hole of complacency & ego. Ego, & a false sense of security or immunity to the effects of the disease which can and does bring us to the brink of either living as dry drunks, or living on the brink of taking that first drink, both of which bring us to LIVING IN, "UN-TREATED ALCOHOLISM."
I have watched many of us, including myself, either live as dry drunks in the miserable reality of untreated alcoholism, or return to use in active alcoholism. The miserable reality of living in relapse mode/untreated alcoholism can & has brought many to either taking their own lives in suicide or to active drinking in returning to use.
My relapse mode 13 yrs ago at almost 7 yrs of recovery, while diligently taking the 12 steps, with a consistent sponsor throughout the whole 6yrs 9 months, was not enough to keep me from living in relapse mode/untreated alcoholism for approx a whole year before I returned to active use.
I can return to old ideas and old ways of perceiving my life experiences in a heart beat. I can convince myself I am correct in my perceptions in a New York second. I can convince others around me I am correct in my perception by using my excellent ability to manipulate the facts/truth in such a way that all who see (only the small part of the story I am willing to share) agree with my perception.
I heard a woman on a speaker tape from the 1980's say that she, " Had won every battle she was ever in out there, but she had, "Lost the War!!
The degree of denial I am capable of in sobriety is directly related to the degree of fear being generated by what ever, " issue from my past life experience , or character defect still in my possession & use," which I am dealing with in my current life of recovery.
If I do not have a current sponsor & more than a hand full of close friends in recovery who are sober, & a home group I attend faithfully weekly or daily, all of whom know the intimate goings on of my life & issues I am dealing with in my current and past recovery, then I might a well be playing Russian Roulette with my life & the quality of the lives of those I love around me.
This I share with you from my heart of hearts and my honest experience with my own recovery. I just celebrated 13 years of staying in the truth and out of denial to the best of my ability. I have not run away from any issue which produces fear in my recovery life. This has not been an easy feat, yet with a conscious contact with a power greater than I it has been achieved.
I have begun to fall into different levels of denial about different aspects of my current experiences in recovery life. The constant undercurrent each time denial has become alive in my ability to perceive has always been different levels of fear in relation to these issues. If I can continue to honestly inventory my fears in how they relate to each issue as more is revealed to me for recovery work then I can remain teachable.
However, if I allow these fears to over ride my ability to remain completely honest with myself and others then I am in sure danger of relapse into old ideas and ways of dealing with my life experiences. Old ideas can even show up as "new old ideas" in recovery. Meaning; they can wear a new mask and act as if they are new when in actuality they are just old ideas.
Again ..... my disease is out to kill me but it's not out to kill you. If I remain alone in my head and heart with my sickness it is sure to kill me. If I take you with me into this dangerous neighborhood in my head and heart you will see the bad guys and save me from myself.
So the answer is
What I don't stand a chance in hell of doing by myself, we can do together, but only if I allow you into my intimate world of fear and insanity. This is really the only place where I have needed courage in my recovery so far. Allowing you to see me in my naked emotional vulnerabilities, even tho I am afraid you won't like or love me anymore.
I have never in all these years had anyone in this program stop loving me because I showed them my insane disease. I have lost friendships and trust when I allowed fear to be more important than you and the truth!!
Love to you all and thanks for all the birthday wishes the other day!!
In Love Light Truth & Service
Stubborn T "
I must work with others in recovery. Others who are remaining teachable & out of the black hole of complacency & ego. Ego, & a false sense of security or immunity to the effects of the disease which can and does bring us to the brink of either living as dry drunks, or living on the brink of taking that first drink, both of which bring us to LIVING IN, "UN-TREATED ALCOHOLISM."
I have watched many of us, including myself, either live as dry drunks in the miserable reality of untreated alcoholism, or return to use in active alcoholism. The miserable reality of living in relapse mode/untreated alcoholism can & has brought many to either taking their own lives in suicide or to active drinking in returning to use.
My relapse mode 13 yrs ago at almost 7 yrs of recovery, while diligently taking the 12 steps, with a consistent sponsor throughout the whole 6yrs 9 months, was not enough to keep me from living in relapse mode/untreated alcoholism for approx a whole year before I returned to active use.
I can return to old ideas and old ways of perceiving my life experiences in a heart beat. I can convince myself I am correct in my perceptions in a New York second. I can convince others around me I am correct in my perception by using my excellent ability to manipulate the facts/truth in such a way that all who see (only the small part of the story I am willing to share) agree with my perception.
I heard a woman on a speaker tape from the 1980's say that she, " Had won every battle she was ever in out there, but she had, "Lost the War!!
The degree of denial I am capable of in sobriety is directly related to the degree of fear being generated by what ever, " issue from my past life experience , or character defect still in my possession & use," which I am dealing with in my current life of recovery.
If I do not have a current sponsor & more than a hand full of close friends in recovery who are sober, & a home group I attend faithfully weekly or daily, all of whom know the intimate goings on of my life & issues I am dealing with in my current and past recovery, then I might a well be playing Russian Roulette with my life & the quality of the lives of those I love around me.
This I share with you from my heart of hearts and my honest experience with my own recovery. I just celebrated 13 years of staying in the truth and out of denial to the best of my ability. I have not run away from any issue which produces fear in my recovery life. This has not been an easy feat, yet with a conscious contact with a power greater than I it has been achieved.
I have begun to fall into different levels of denial about different aspects of my current experiences in recovery life. The constant undercurrent each time denial has become alive in my ability to perceive has always been different levels of fear in relation to these issues. If I can continue to honestly inventory my fears in how they relate to each issue as more is revealed to me for recovery work then I can remain teachable.
However, if I allow these fears to over ride my ability to remain completely honest with myself and others then I am in sure danger of relapse into old ideas and ways of dealing with my life experiences. Old ideas can even show up as "new old ideas" in recovery. Meaning; they can wear a new mask and act as if they are new when in actuality they are just old ideas.
Again ..... my disease is out to kill me but it's not out to kill you. If I remain alone in my head and heart with my sickness it is sure to kill me. If I take you with me into this dangerous neighborhood in my head and heart you will see the bad guys and save me from myself.
So the answer is
What I don't stand a chance in hell of doing by myself, we can do together, but only if I allow you into my intimate world of fear and insanity. This is really the only place where I have needed courage in my recovery so far. Allowing you to see me in my naked emotional vulnerabilities, even tho I am afraid you won't like or love me anymore.
I have never in all these years had anyone in this program stop loving me because I showed them my insane disease. I have lost friendships and trust when I allowed fear to be more important than you and the truth!!
Love to you all and thanks for all the birthday wishes the other day!!
In Love Light Truth & Service
Stubborn T "
Billy